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第7章

MONKEY knew nothing about official matters, and it was fortunate that all he had to do was to mark his name on a list. For the rest, he and his subordinates ate their three meals, slept soundly at night, had no worries, but only perfect freedom and independence. When there was nothing else going on, he went round and made friends with the other denizens of heaven. He was careful to address the members of the Trinity as 'Venerable,' and the four Emperors as 'Majesty'; but all the rest, Planets, Lunar Mansions, spirits of the Hours and Days, he treated as equals. Today he wandered east, tomorrow rambled west; his goings and comings were unhampered as the passage of the clouds. One day at Court an Immortal stepped forward and made the following petition: 'I submit that the Sage, Equal of Heaven has no duties to perform. He spends all his time going round and making friends. All the stars of heaven, high and low, are now his cronies. Trouble will come of it, unless some way is found of employing his time.' The Jade Emperor accordingly sent for Monkey, who arrived in high glee, asking, 'What promotion or reward has your Majesty sent for me to announce?' 'I hear,' said the Emperor, 'that you have nothing in particular to do, and I am going to give you a job. You are to look after the Peach Garden; I wish you to devote the greatest attention to this work.'

Monkey was in wild delight, and unable to wait for a moment he rushed off to take over his new duties in the Peach Garden. Here he found a Local Spirit, who cried out to him, 'Great Sage, where are you going?' 'To take charge of the Peach Garden,' he said. 'I've been appointed by his Majesty.' The spirit bowed low, and called to Hoe-earth, Draw-water, Peach-tender and Leaf-sweeper, the strong men who worked the garden, to come forward and kowtow to Monkey.

'How many trees are there?' Monkey asked of the local spirit. 'Three thousand six hundred,' he said. 'On the outer side, one thousand two hundred, with inconspicuous flowers and small fruit. They ripen once in three thousand years. Whoever eats them becomes a fairy, all-wise; his limbs are strong and his body light. In the middle of the garden are one thousand two hundred trees, with double blossom and sweet fruit. They ripen once in six thousand years. Whoever eats them can levitate at will, and never grows old. At the back of the garden are one thousand two hundred trees. The fruit has purple markings and the stones are pale yellow. They ripen once in nine thousand years. Whoever eats them outlasts heaven and earth, and is the compeer of sun and moon.' Monkey was delighted, and began at once inspecting the trees and listing the arbours and pagodas. Henceforward he amused himself only once a month, on the day of the full moon, but otherwise saw no friends and went nowhere. One day he saw that high up on some of the trees many of the peaches were ripe, and he made up his mind to eat them before any one else got a chance. Unfortunately he was closely watched by his followers, and to shake them off he said, 'I am feeling tired and am going to take a short rest in that arbour. Go and wait for me outside the gates.' When they had retired, he took off his court hat and robes, and scrambled up on to a high tree, and began to pluck the ripest and largest fruit he could see. Sitting astride a bough, he regaled himself to his heart's content, and then came down. He put on his hat and robes, and called to his followers to attend him while he returned in state to his lodging. After a few days, he did the same thing again.

One morning her Majesty the Queen of Heaven, having made up her mind to give a Peach Banquet, told the fairy maidens, Red Jacket, Blue Jacket, White Jacket, Black Jacket, Purple Jacket, Yellow Jacket and Green Jacket to take their baskets and pick peaches in the Peach Garden. They found Monkey's followers barring the gate. 'We have come,' they said, 'by command of her Majesty to pick peaches for a banquet.' 'Halt, my fairy beauties,' said one of the guards. 'Things have changed since last year. This garden has been put in charge of the Great Sage, Equal of Heaven, and we must get his permission, before we can let you in.' 'Where is he?' they asked. 'He's feeling rather tired,' a guardian spirit said, 'and is having a nap in the arbour.' 'Very well then,' they said, 'go and look for him, for we must get to work at once.' They consented to go and tell him, but found the arbour empty, save for Monkey's hat and robe. They began looking for him, but he was nowhere to be seen. The fact was that Monkey, after slipping away and eating several peaches, had changed himself into a little fellow two inches long, and was curled up asleep under a thick leaf high up on the tree. 'We must carry out out orders,' said the fairy maidens, 'whether you find him or not. We can't go back empty-handed.' 'Quite right, fairy beauties,' said an officer, 'we must not keep you waiting. Our master has been used to going about a great deal, and probably he has gone to look up some of his old friends. Just you go and pick your peaches, and we'll tell him when he comes back.'

So they went into the garden, and first they picked three basketsful from the trees in the near part of the garden, then three from the trees in the middle. But when they came to the trees at the back, they found nothing but snapped stalks. All the peaches had been taken. However, when they had looked about for some time, they did succeed in finding one solitary peach that was not quite ripe, hanging on a southwards facing bough. Blue Jacket pulled the bough towards her and picked the peach, then let go. This was the very bough where Monkey was sleeping in his diminutive form. The jerk awoke him, and rapidly changing himself back again, he cried out, 'Where have you come from, monsters, and how comes it that you have the audacity to pick my peaches?' The terrified fairy maidens with one accord fell upon their knees, crying, 'Great Sage, don't be angry! We are not monsters; we are seven fairy maidens sent by the Queen of Heaven to pick peaches for her Peach Banquet. When we came to the gate, we found your officers on guard. They looked every-where for you, but couldn't find you. We were afraid to keep her Majesty waiting, so as you could not be found we came in and began to pick. We beseech you to forgive us!' Monkey became all affability. 'Rise from your knees, fairies,' he said. 'Tell me now, who is invited to this banquet?' 'It is an official banquet,' they said, 'and certain deities are invited as a matter of course. The Buddha of the Western Heaven will be there, and the Bodhisattvas and Lo-hans; Kuan-yin too, and all the Immortals of the Ten Islands. Then there will be the five spirits of the Pole Star, the Emperors of the Four Quarters, the gods and immortals of the seas and hills-all of them will come to the banquet?' 'Shall I be asked?' enquired Monkey. 'I haven't heard it suggested,' one of them said. 'But I am the Great Sage, Equal of Heaven,' said Monkey. 'I don't see why I shouldn't be invited.' 'We can only tell you who is invited according to the rules,' they said. 'What will be done this time, we don't know.' 'Quite right, my dears,' said Monkey. 'I'm not blaming you. Just you wait here while I go off and scout round a little, to see whether I'm to be invited or not to be invited.'

Dear Monkey! He recited a magic formula and cried to the maidens, 'Stay, stay, stay.' This was a fixing magic, and the fairies in consequence of it remained rooted to the spot where they stood. Monkey set off on his magic cloud, sailed clear of the garden, and hastened towards the Pool of Green Jade. On the way he ran straight into the Red-legged Immortal. At once he thought of a plan by which he might trick the Immortal and attend the feast himself. 'Old Wisdom, where are you going?' he asked. 'I have been invited to the Peach Banquet,' the Immortal answered. 'You probably haven't heard…' said Monkey. 'I've been asked by the Jade Emperor, because I get about so fast on my cloud, to go round to all the guests and tell them there's going to be a rehearsal of ceremonies first, in the Hall of Penetrating Light.' The Immortal was a guileless soul, and was completely taken in. 'Other years we've always had the rehearsal at the same place as the banquet,' he said. 'However, I'm much obliged,' and turning his cloud he made towards the Hall of Penetrating Light.

Then, reciting a spell, Monkey changed himself into the exact image of the Red-legged Immortal and went straight to the Green Jade Pool. After a little while he came to the Treasure Tower, and stepped softly in. Everything was set out for the feast, but no one had yet arrived. Monkey was gazing at the scene, when suddenly a smell of brewing assaulted him. He turned round and in a gallery on the right saw a number of fairy ministrants making wine. Some were carrying the mashed grain, others bringing water. Boys were keeping up the fire, jugs were being washed and jars swept. The wine that had already been made was exhaling a delicious perfume. Monkey's mouth watered, and he would have gone and drunk some at once, had it not been for the presence of all these servants. He was obliged to employ his magic powers. Pulling out a handful of his finest down, he tossed it into his mouth and bit it into ever smaller pieces; then he spat it out, crying 'Change!' and the hairs changed into so many Drowsy Insects, which flew towards the servants and settled on their cheeks. Look at them, how their hands fall to their sides and their heads sink down, their eyes close and they fall asleep.

Monkey then snatched up some of the finest viands, the daintiest dishes, ran into the gallery, seized a jug, tilted a jar, set to and drank deeply.

When he had been drinking for some time and was already pretty drunk, he thought to himself, 'Bad! bad! The guests will soon be arriving, and I shall get into trouble. It's no good staying here; I'd better go and have a sleep in my own quarters.' Dear Monkey! Staggering and blundering along, very much the worse for liquor, he lost his way and instead of getting home he arrived at the Tushita Palace. Suddenly he came to himself and realized where he was. 'Why, this is where Lao Tzu lives,' he said to himself. 'How did I get here? Well, I've always wanted to meet that old man and have never had the chance. It wouldn't be a bad idea, as I am here, to go and have a look at him.' So he tidied his clothes and went in. But there were no signs of Lao Tzu or any one else. Actually Lao Tzu was in an upper room with Dīpānkara, Buddha of the Past, expounding the Way to an audience of Immortal officers, pages and officials.

Monkey went straight into the alchemical laboratory. There was no one there, but a brazier at one side of the hearth was burning, with five gourds arranged round it, and in these gourds was finished elixir. 'This,' said Monkey to himself in high glee, 'is the highest treasure of the Immortals. Since my Illumination I have solved the secret of the identity of Inside and Outside, and was on the verge of producing a little elixir on my own account, when unexpectedly I came home and was busy with other things. I think I'll try a pill or two.' He tilted the gourds and ate up the contents for all the world as though it had been a dish of fried beans.

After a while, full of elixir, and the effects of the wine now wearing off, he again took stock of the situation, and said to himself, 'Bad! Bad! This escapade of mine is even more unfortunate than the last. If the Jade Emperor gets to hear of it, I am lost. Run! Run! Run! I was better off as a king in the world below.'

He rushed out of the Tushita Palace, not going his usual way, but making for the Western Gate of Heaven. Here he used a magic that made him invisible, and lowered his cloud till he was back on the borders of the Mountain of Flowers and Fruit. A flash of banners and gleam of spears told him that his followers were practising the arts of war. 'Little ones, I am here,' he cried aloud. They all flung down their weapons and fell upon their knees. 'Great Sage,' they said, 'you're very neglectful of your subjects. Fancy going off all this while without a thought about what becomes of us!' However, they made a great banquet to welcome him, and brought him a huge stone bowl full of date-wine. After drinking a mouthful, he made a very wry face, saying, 'What horrible stuff! I can't drink this.' Two of his generals rushed forward. 'Great Sage,' they said, 'no doubt in the Palace of Heaven you have been drinking the wine of the Immortals, and for that reason cannot stomach this date-wine. But the proverb says: "There is no water like home water!"' 'And it goes on: "There are no folk like home folk,"' said Monkey. 'When I was enjoying myself at the Pool of Green Jade I saw flagon after flagon of jade-juice and ruby-extract, such as you have never in your lives tasted. I'll go back and steal some for you. Half a cup each, and you'll none of you ever grow old.'

All the monkeys were delighted, and the Sage went out to the cave door, turned his somersault, made himself invisible and returned to Heaven. He found the makers of wine, carriers of dregs and water and lighters of fire all still snoring heavily. Taking a couple of large flagons, one under each arm, and two more, one in each hand, he turned his cloud and came back. A great assembly of monkeys was held and each got a cupful or two. There was a rapturous scene.

Meanwhile the seven fairy maidens remained spell-bound a whole day. When at last they could move, they took up their flower-baskets, and going back to the Queen of Heaven they told her that the Sage, Equal of Heaven had held them back by magic, that was why they were so late. 'How many peaches did you pick?' she asked. 'We got two baskets of small peaches and three baskets of middling peaches. But when we came to the back of the garden we found that half the big peaches were already gone. It seems that the Great Sage has eaten them. While he was being looked for, he suddenly appeared in our midst, made a fearful scene, and asked who had been invited to the banquet. We told him about the usual arrangements for such feasts, whereupon he bound us by a spell and went off we didn't know where. We have only just managed to break the spell and come back.'

The Queen of Heaven went straight to the Jade Emperor, and was telling him what had happened, when a crowd of wine-makers and other celestial officials came pouring in, announcing that someone had made a mess of all the arrangements for the banquet, stolen the wine and eaten up all the dainties. At this moment the Supreme Patriarch of Tao was announced. The Emperor and his consort went out to meet him. 'I am sorry to have to report to your Majesties,' said Lao Tzu, 'that the Elixir which I was concocting for the next Cinnabar Banquet has been stolen.' Presently one of Monkey's celestial attendants arrived, and reported that the Great Sage had been missing since the day before and no one knew what had become of him. The Jade Emperor's suspicions were now confirmed. At this point the Red-legged Immortal appeared before the Throne. 'I was on my way to the banquet,' he said, 'in response to her Majesty's invitation, when I met the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven, who told me that he had been asked to inform all guests that they were to go first to the Hall of Penetrating Light and rehearse the ceremonies of the banquet. I did as he said. But when I got there, I saw no sign of your Majesties having arrived, and thought it better to come at once to Court.' The Jade Emperor was more outraged and astounded than ever. 'So the rogue counterfeits Imperial orders and deceives my ministers!' he exclaimed. 'Tell the Celestial Detective to get on to his tracks at once.' After an exhaustive enquiry, the Detective reported that the disturbances in Heaven had been caused by the Great Sage.

The Jade Emperor then commanded the Kings of the Four Quarters and Vai?ravana and his son to marshal the twenty-eight Lunar Mansions, the Nine Planets, the Twelve Hours and all the Stars, together with a hundred thousand heavenly soldiers, and draw a cordon round the Mountain of Flowers and Fruit, so that Monkey should have no escape.

When this had been done, the Nine Planets were called upon to issue the challenge. Monkey and his generals were drinking wine from Heaven, and when he was told that the Planets were at the door, he refused to worry himself.

If to-day you have wine, get drunk to-day;

Pay no heed to what is at the door, be it good or ill.

he quoted. A small imp now scurried up saying that these nine fierce deities were raging at the gate, flinging battle-taunts. Monkey only laughed. 'Don't pay any attention to them!' he said:

Poetry and wine are enough to make this day glad;

High deeds must take their turn, glory can afford to wait.

But while he was speaking, another imp rushed in. 'Father,' he cried, 'those nine fierce deities have broken down the gates and are advancing to the attack.' 'Have those scoundrels no manners!' cried Monkey. 'I've never interfered with them. Why should they come here worrying me?' And he ordered the One Horned Ogre to lead out the kings of the seventy-two caves to battle, while he and his four generals came in the rear. The ogre and his followers could get no further than the Iron Bridge. Here the Planets barred their path. 'Make way!' cried Monkey, and he strode through their midst, brandishing his cudgel. The Planets dared not oppose him, and beat a hasty retreat. When they had re-formed their ranks a little way back, their leader cried, 'Insensate groom! What crime is there that you have not committed? You have stolen peaches and stolen wine, upset the high feast, purloined Lao Tzu's elixir, and then taken more wine for your banquet here. You have piled up sin upon sin; do you not realize what you have done?' 'Quite true,' said Monkey, 'all quite true. What are you going to do about it?' 'We have been sent by the Jade Emperor,' they said, 'to receive your submission. If you surrender at once, you will be spared; if not, we shall stamp on your mountain till it is flat, and smash your cave to bits.' 'And where are you going to get the strength from,' asked Monkey, 'to do that? How dare you talk such nonsense! Stand your ground and take Old Monkey's cudgel.' The Planets leapt at him; but Monkey was no whit afraid. He brandished his cudgel, parrying here and thrusting there, till the Planets were quite worn out and one by one slunk away trailing their weapons after them, to seek refuge in their tents. 'That Monkey King is a valiant fighter indeed,' they said to Vai?ravana. 'We were unable to overcome him, and have had to give up the fight.' The Kings of the Four Quarters and the Twenty-Eight Lunar Mansions were then ordered to advance. But Monkey did not quail, but bade the One Horned Ogre, the kings of the seventy-two caves and his four valiant generals to take their stand outside the cave.

The combat began at dawn, and lasted till the sun sank behind the western hills. The One Horned Ogre and all the kings of the seventy-two caves were captured and carried away. Only the four generals and the monkeys escaped and hid in the far recesses of the cave. But Monkey all alone, cudgel in hand, held back the kings of the Four Quarters, Vai?ravana and Natha, warring with them half way up the sky. At last, seeing that dusk was at hand, he plucked a handful of his hairs, tossed them into his mouth, chewed them up small and spat them out, crying 'Change!' Whereupon they changed into thousands of monkeys each armed with a metal-plated cudgel. They drove back Vai?ravana, Natha and the four kings. Then Monkey, at last victorious, withdrew the hairs and returned to his cave. At the Iron Bridge, he was met by the four generals and all the host of monkeys. On seeing him they wailed three times, and laughed, hee-hee, ho-ho, three times. 'What made you wail three times and laugh three times when you saw me?' asked Monkey. 'We wailed,' they said, 'because the One Horned Ogre and the seventy-two kings were defeated and captured, and because we had to fly for our lives. We laughed with joy because you have come back victorious and unharmed.'

'There is always defeat in victory and victory in defeat,' said Monkey. 'There is an old saying "To slay ten thousand costs three thousand." In this case the chieftains captured were all tigers, leopards, wolves and the like. Not one of our monkey-kind was taken or hurt; so there is nothing to worry about. By the art of self-division I have put them to flight. But it is certain that they have encamped at the foot of our mountain. We must keep strict guard and husband our strength. Tomorrow you shall see me use my most potent magic against those divinities, and avenge the captured.'

Then the four generals and all the monkeys drank a cup or two of date-wine and went quietly to sleep.

After the retreat of the kings of the Four Quarters, all the celestial warriors told of their deeds. Some had captured tigers and leopards, some deer, some wolves and foxes. But not one of them could boast that he had taken a monkey. They did indeed, as Monkey had foretold, set up a camp, surrounding it with a great palisade. Here the meritorious were rewarded, and the troops who formed the cordon round the caves were instructed to give warning by bell or cry and be ready for the great battle that would begin at dawn.

How they fared after day broke, you will hear in the next chapter.

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    叶依云,生活在苗疆的小小少女,因为端午那日献出的毒蛊一不小心把五毒教圣物金蚕给毒死了,于是怀揣着呆呆的小蛇青青和一个不会响的铃铛开始跑路。机缘巧合之下叶依云解开银坠的秘密,发现自己身怀两系灵根,生母另有其人,过往的一切都被颠覆,然而却在水深火热中毅然踏上了修真之路。●﹏●初出江湖,五毒少女路见不平拔刀相助救到正太白笙一枚,据说出自杏林世家。可是你一小小嫩娃为什么每天都在愁娶不到老婆的人生大事。“小白,你不要跟着我了,去找你妈妈去。”“不行,我不能留老婆大人一个人在这种危险的地方。”叶依云满头黑线“我是毒女,你是医师,我们生下来就是为了互相战斗的!”“才不是,你生下来是为了给不顺眼的人下毒,而我,生下来就是为了让你下毒然后自己治好然后你再下我再治好的…”“可是我比你大。”“我就喜欢年纪大的,懂事儿!”“可是你是木系灵根纯净天生青木元罡的天才,而我只是水土参杂的破败灵根。”“没关系,男人是应该厉害一点的,不然怎么保护自己老婆。”叶依云“我说这话的原因是我觉得木系很差劲,打架的时候不好用。”白笙“…”●﹏●“青青上,咬它!”少女躲在大树后替自己的小蛇加油助威,只听得咯噔一声,牙崩了。“青青你太没用了!”绿油油的小蛇伏在她的手腕上做镯子状。“喂喂喂,你皮这么厚,你妈妈知道么?”粉红色的蝎子尾巴摇啊摇。“喂喂喂,你别过来啊。”尖利的声音传来,惊起了满林的虫鸟。少女对着阳光看向手中的小鼎,一只缩小无数倍的粉红小蝎在里面打转“说了让你不要过来了,你就是不听。”崩了门牙的青青发出漏气的笑声。●﹏●五毒聚首,少女悍然突破灵根极限,强势跨入修真人士梦寐以求的炼虚之境。炼气甲“我会水火两系法术。”叶依云“我能毒死你。”筑基乙“我有本命飞剑,可千里之外取人首级。”叶依云“我能毒死你。”金丹丙“我有宝印曰九曲,能移山填海。”叶依云“我有一个不会响的小铃铛,里面可以养虫子,然后,毒死你。”“…”且看昔日苗疆少女如何成长为一代毒仙,她以毒入道,以毒成仙,却始终保持着善良的本心。从小分离的母亲将最好的祝愿留给她——我一直在你身边。不离不弃的萌宠带她赢得一场又一场的战斗——你以真心待我,我以生命偿之少年用稚嫩的肩膀陪她走过荆棘与坎坷——爱情,与年龄无关最后,叶依云是从了还是从了白笙?那就从了吧。