"Mr. SWINNEY!" roared Brough, in a voice still bigger than before, "when you came into this office--this family, sir, for such it is, as I am proud to say--you found three-and-twenty as pious and well-regulated young men as ever laboured together--as ever had confided to them the wealth of this mighty capital and famous empire. You found, sir, sobriety, regularity, and decorum; no profane songs were uttered in this place sacred to--to business; no slanders were whispered against the heads of the establishment--but over them Ipass: I can afford, sir, to pass them by--no worldly conversation or foul jesting disturbed the attention of these gentlemen, or desecrated the peaceful scene of their labours. You found Christians and gentlemen, sir!""I paid for my place like the rest," said Swinney. "Didn't my governor take sha-?""Silence, sir! Your worthy father did take shares in this establishment, which will yield him one day an immense profit. He DID take shares, sir, or you never would have been here. I glory in saying that every one of my young friends around me has a father, a brother, a dear relative or friend, who is connected in a similar way with our glorious enterprise; and that not one of them is there but has an interest in procuring, at a liberal commission, other persons to join the ranks of our Association. BUT, sir, I am its chief. You will find, sir, your appointment signed by me; and in like manner, I, John Brough, annul it. Go from us, sir!--leave us--quit a family that can no longer receive you in its bosom! Mr.
Swinney, I have wept--I have prayed, sir, before I came to this determination; I have taken counsel, sir, and am resolved. DEPARTFROM OUT OF US!
"Not without three months' salary, though, Mr. B.: that cock won't fight!""They shall be paid to your father, sir.""My father be hanged! I tell you what, Brough, I'm of age; and if you don't pay me my salary, I'll arrest you,--by Jingo, I will!
I'll have you in quod, or my name's not Bob Swinney!""Make out a cheque, Mr. Roundhand, for the three months' salary of this perverted young man.""Twenty-one pun' five, Roundhand, and nothing for the stamp!" cried out that audacious Swinney. "There it is, sir, RE-ceipted. You needn't cross it to my banker's. And if any of you gents like a glass of punch this evening at eight o'clock, Bob Swinney's your man, and nothing to pay. If Mr. Brough WOULD do me the honour to come in and take a whack? Come, don't say no, if you'd rather not!"We couldn't stand this impudence, and all burst out laughing like mad.
"Leave the room!" yelled Mr. Brough, whose face had turned quite blue; and so Bob took his white hat off the peg, and strolled away with his "tile," as he called it, very much on one side. When he was gone, Mr. Brough gave us another lecture, by which we all determined to profit; and going up to Roundhand's desk put his arm round his neck, and looked over the ledger.
"What money has been paid in to-day, Roundhand?" he said, in a very kind way.
"The widow, sir, came with her money; nine hundred and four ten and six--say 904L. 10S. 6D. Captain Sparr, sir, paid his shares up;grumbles, though, and says he's no more: fifty shares, two instalments--three fifties, sir.""He's always grumbling!"
"He says he has not a shilling to bless himself with until our dividend day.""Any more?"
Mr. Roundhand went through the book, and made it up nineteen hundred pounds in all. We were doing a famous business now; though when I came into the office, we used to sit, and laugh, and joke, and read the newspapers all day; bustling into our seats whenever a stray customer came. Brough never cared about our laughing and singing THEN, and was hand and glove with Bob Swinney; but that was in early times, before we were well in harness.
"Nineteen hundred pounds, and a thousand pounds in shares. Bravo, Roundhand--bravo, gentlemen! Remember, every share you bring in brings you five per cent. down on the nail! Look to your friends--stick to your desks--be regular--I hope none of you forget church.
Who takes Mr. Swinney's place?"
"Mr. Samuel Titmarsh, sir."
"Mr. Titmarsh, I congratulate you. Give me your hand, sir: you are now twelfth clerk of this Association, and your salary is consequently increased five pounds a year. How is your worthy mother, sir--your dear and excellent parent? In good health Itrust? And long--long, I fervently pray, may this office continue to pay her annuity! Remember, if she has more money to lay out, there is higher interest than the last for her, for she is a year older; and five per cent. for you, my boy! Why not you as well as another? Young men will be young men, and a ten-pound note does no harm. Does it, Mr. Abednego?""Oh, no!" says Abednego, who was third clerk, and who was the chap that informed against Swinney; and he began to laugh, as indeed we all did whenever Mr. Brough made anything like a joke: not that they WERE jokes; only we used to know it by his face.
"Oh, by-the-bye, Roundhand," says he, "a word with you on business.
Mrs. Brough wants to know why the deuce you never come down to Fulham.""Law, that's very polite!" said Mr. Roundhand, quite pleased.
"Name your day, my boy! Say Saturday, and bring your night-cap with you.""You're very polite, I'm sure. I should be delighted beyond anything, but--""But--no buts, my boy! Hark ye! the Chancellor of the Exchequer does me the honour to dine with us, and I want you to see him; for the truth is, I have bragged about you to his Lordship as the best actuary in the three kingdoms."Roundhand could not refuse such an invitation as THAT, though he had told us how Mrs. R. and he were going to pass Saturday and Sunday at Putney; and we who knew what a life the poor fellow led, were sure that the head clerk would be prettily scolded by his lady when she heard what was going on. She disliked Mrs. Brough very much, that was the fact; because Mrs. B. kept a carriage, and said she didn't know where Pentonville was, and couldn't call on Mrs.
Roundhand. Though, to be sure, her coachman might have found out the way.
