登陆注册
4771600000172

第172章

“Ah these cigarettes!” Porfiry Petrovitch ejaculated at last, having lighted one. “They are pernicious, positively pernicious, and yet I can’t give them up! I cough, I begin to have tickling in my throat and a difficulty in breathing. You know I am a coward, I went lately to Dr. B——n; he always gives at least half an hour to each patient. He positively laughed looking at me; he sounded me: ‘Tobacco’s bad for you,’ he said, ‘your lungs are affected.’ But how am I to give it up? What is there to take its place? I don’t drink, that’s the mischief, he-he-he, that I don’t. Everything is relative, Rodion Romanovitch, everything is relative!”

“Why, he’s playing his professional tricks again,” Raskolnikov thought with disgust. All the circumstances of their last interview suddenly came back to him, and he felt a rush of the feeling that had come upon him then.

“I came to see you the day before yesterday, in the evening; you didn’t know?” Porfiry Petrovitch went on, looking round the room. “I came into this very room. I was passing by, just as I did to-day, and I thought I’d return your call. I walked in as your door was wide open, I looked round, waited and went out without leaving my name with your servant. Don’t you lock your door?”

Raskolnikov’s face grew more and more gloomy. Porfiry seemed to guess his state of mind.

“I’ve come to have it out with you, Rodion Romanovitch, my dear fellow! I owe you an explanation and must give it to you,” he continued with a slight smile, just patting Raskolnikov’s knee.

But almost at the same instant a serious and careworn look came into his face; to his surprise Raskolnikov saw a touch of sadness in it. He had never seen and never suspected such an expression in his face.

“A strange scene passed between us last time we met, Rodion Romanovitch. Our first interview, too, was a strange one; but then … and one thing after another! This is the point: I have perhaps acted unfairly to you; I feel it. Do you remember how we parted? Your nerves were unhinged and your knees were shaking and so were mine. And, you know, our behaviour was unseemly, even ungentlemanly. And yet we are gentlemen, above all, in any case, gentlemen; that must be understood. Do you remember what we came to? … and it was quite indecorous.”

“What is he up to, what does he take me for?” Raskolnikov asked himself in amazement, raising his head and looking with open eyes on Porfiry.

“I’ve decided openness is better between us,” Porfiry Petrovitch went on, turning his head away and dropping his eyes, as though unwilling to disconcert his former victim and as though disdaining his former wiles. “Yes, such suspicions and such scenes cannot continue for long. Nikolay put a stop to it, or I don’t know what we might not have come to. That damned workman was sitting at the time in the next room—can you realise that? You know that, of course; and I am aware that he came to you afterwards. But what you supposed then was not true: I had not sent for anyone, I had made no kind of arrangements. You ask why I hadn’t? What shall I say to you? it had all come upon me so suddenly. I had scarcely sent for the porters (you noticed them as you went out, I dare say). An idea flashed upon me; I was firmly convinced at the time, you see, Rodion Romanovitch. Come, I thought—even if I let one thing slip for a time, I shall get hold of something else—I shan’t lose what I want, anyway. You are nervously irritable, Rodion Romanovitch, by temperament; it’s out of proportion with other qualities of your heart and character, which I flatter myself I have to some extent divined. Of course I did reflect even then that it does not always happen that a man gets up and blurts out his whole story. It does happen sometimes, if you make a man lose all patience, though even then it’s rare. I was capable of realising that. If I only had a fact, I thought, the least little fact to go upon, something I could lay hold of, something tangible, not merely psychological. For if a man is guilty, you must be able to get something substantial out of him; one may reckon upon most surprising results indeed. I was reckoning on your temperament, Rodion Romanovitch, on your temperament above all things! I had great hopes of you at that time.”

“But what are you driving at now?” Raskolnikov muttered at last, asking the question without thinking.

“What is he talking about?” he wondered distractedly, “does he really take me to be innocent?”

“What am I driving at? I’ve come to explain myself, I consider it my duty, so to speak. I want to make clear to you how the whole business, the whole misunderstanding arose. I’ve caused you a great deal of suffering, Rodion Romanovitch. I am not a monster. I understand what it must mean for a man who has been unfortunate, but who is proud, imperious and above all, impatient, to have to bear such treatment! I regard you in any case as a man of noble character and not without elements of magnanimity, though I don’t agree with all your convictions. I wanted to tell you this first, frankly and quite sincerely, for above all I don’t want to deceive you. When I made your acquaintance, I felt attracted by you. Perhaps you will laugh at my saying so. You have a right to. I know you disliked me from the first and indeed you’ve no reason to like me. You may think what you like, but I desire now to do all I can to efface that impression and to show that I am a man of heart and conscience. I speak sincerely.”

Porfiry Petrovitch made a dignified pause. Raskolnikov felt a rush of renewed alarm. The thought that Porfiry believed him to be innocent began to make him uneasy.

同类推荐
  • Roundabout Papers

    Roundabout Papers

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 至言总卷

    至言总卷

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 中边分别论

    中边分别论

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 千转陀罗尼观世音菩萨咒经

    千转陀罗尼观世音菩萨咒经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 海运说

    海运说

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 狂医至尊之废材七小姐

    狂医至尊之废材七小姐

    “滚,爷岂是你能惦记的。”某女一脸的嫌弃。某男笑的妖孽:“殇儿不能惦记,为夫让你惦记。”一脚踹飞。她,是末世的灭尸队组长离殇与丧尸王卡罗同归于尽后,穿越到凌炎大陆废物月离殇的身上,从此丹药当糖药吃,武器随便拿,神兽当小弟,废物逆天,傲视天下。他,是皇族的最宠爱的皇子,身份神秘来到这最低等的国家疗伤,万年冰封的心出现了道不明说不清的情愫。
  • 九极圣域

    九极圣域

    武修,辟玄脉,化丹海,凝玄轮,渡虚空,方能成就一代强者,离开百国之地,前往那圣域之地。少年凌辰,因离家出走,遭遇截杀,修为被封印。五年之后,他手指帝星剑,自天灵城而出,誓要回凌家,问个究竟!
  • 五部六册

    五部六册

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 重生之傲游九天

    重生之傲游九天

    :浩瀚宇宙,大千世界,芸芸众生只不过是历史长河中的一粒尘埃,不成仙、终是空,一代强者萧何渡仙劫失败,被一道神秘灵光裹着一缕魂魄划破星空而去,醒来之后发现居然身处另一个世界……开始一段精彩的旅程
  • Boss大叔束手就擒

    Boss大叔束手就擒

    微信摇一摇,谁知摇出的大叔,居然是收房子的侩子手。百万欠款压下,只能被迫沦为他的女佣。网络上的友好知己,现实中的冤家主仆。当这层纸被戳破,依赖已成为彼此戒不掉的喜欢,大叔乖乖跳到碗里来。
  • 弃心狂君

    弃心狂君

    【本文一女N*男+少许玄幻+极度血腥+温馨浪漫+轻松搞笑】雷家“真拉风”三姐妹雷(家)穿系列!!雷真《弃爱冷君》:雷拉《弃情邪君》:雷风《弃心狂君》:本文(别被开头吓到你!)---------------------------简介:错了,真的错了,这一切都错了,十五年的亲情原来如此渺小,在江山与权利间化为乌有,烟消云散……在进入棺材的那一刻,我多希望自己就此死去,那抹来自地狱的幽灵,却把我从死亡边缘救起,只留下一句:好好活着,别回来了……第二天,我便成了季国的重金通缉者:哥哥的贱妃!--------------------------------小视频地址:(内容只是提示,全部以本文为主)本文慢热,第一人称演义,开头超级虐身,后面轻松温馨。或许勤勤写的不是所有人都会喜欢,或许不是所有人都能接受勤勤的风格,但是,为了保持环境的干净,不喜请绕道!自重!谢谢~-------------------------推荐勤勤文文:吸血贵公子Ⅲ,吸血鬼与天使的故事:《捡回来的吸血王》属于穿越之作,第一人称:《爷,我真的是男人》另类血族专情轻松文:《我的相公不是人》都市专属爱情小白文:《宝贝惹到火》:属于穿越之作:《弃心狂君》:架空作品:《狂妄王爷销魂妃》:穿越一女N男作品:《替身王妃》:血族的诱惑:《我的专属血奴》:血族深情之恋:《吸血贵公子》:都市滥情男女:《危情》:
  • 诸天之吞噬无限

    诸天之吞噬无限

    宇宙星空,万族林立。强者为尊,弱者为食。一场意外,黎平到达另一颗星球,在这武道文明极度发达之地,开喰道,创先河为种族之义而战斗!
  • 惑君

    惑君

    初来乍到,人生地不熟,人为刀俎我为鱼肉,受尽欺凌,既然退无可退,那么,从今往后,我做刀俎,鱼肉他人!==============================***推荐元晞大作《乐为仙》,十分精彩,有你好看!***
  • 频道专业化、品牌化研究:以中央电视台少儿频道为例

    频道专业化、品牌化研究:以中央电视台少儿频道为例

    央视少儿频道是全国少儿频道的“领军人物”,是专业化的“绿色频道”,她的品牌化建设与形成,绝不是一蹴而就的事,而是有其内在规律和成功经验。《频道专业化、品牌化研究:以中央电视台少儿频道为例》以“中央电视台少儿频道”为例进行个案研究,从电视研究微观入手,以小见大,以真实个案展示整体全局。以品牌栏目为关注点,以精品节目为切入点,从电视实务的角度,探讨频道从定位、理念、改版、构成体系、管理手段、节目设计和编排以及核心竞争力等诸多方面的问题,展示了央视少儿频道专业化、品牌化的进程。
  • 无限之开荒者

    无限之开荒者

    武侠世界,灵异世界,仙侠世界,洪荒世界……肖鹏一步一个脚印,向无上天道……进发。……新书《轮回开端》已发布,拜求大大们继续支持大鹏。书友交流群:19512950喜欢本书的大大,没事可以到群里与书友们交流交流哦!