sez he, 'they're goin' for ye in the "Guardian."''Wot's that?' sez I.'Hark to this,' sez he, and reads out that bit that you'll find there."I had opened the paper, and he pointed to a paragraph."There it is.Pooty, ain't it?"I read with amazement as follows:--"If the Pioneer Stage Company want to keep up with the times, and not degenerate into the old style 'one hoss' road-wagon business, they'd better make some reform on the line.They might begin by shipping off some of the old-time whiskey-guzzling drivers who are too high and mighty to do anything but handle the ribbons, and are above speaking to a passenger unless he's a favorite or one of their set.Over-praise for an occasional scrimmage with road agents, and flattery from Eastern greenhorns, have given them the big head.If the fool-killer were let loose on the line with a big club, and knocked a little civility into their heads, it wouldn't be a bad thing, and would be a particular relief to the passengers for Gilead who have to take the stage from Simpson's Bar.""That's my stage," said Yuba Bill quietly, when I had ended; "and that's ME.""But it's impossible," I said eagerly."That insult was never written by Captain Jim.""Captain Jim," repeated Yuba Bill reflectively."Captain Jim,-- yes, that was the name o' the man I was playin' with.Shortish hairy feller, suthin' between a big coyote and the old-style hair- trunk.Fought pretty well for a hay-footed man from Gil-e-ad.""But you've whipped the wrong man, Bill," I said."Think again! Have you had any quarrel lately?--run against any newspaper man?" The recollection had flashed upon me that Lacy Bassett had lately returned from a visit to Stockton.
Yuba Bill regarded his boots on the other arm-chair for a few moments in profound meditation."There was a sort o' gaudy insect," he began presently, "suthin' halfway betwixt a boss-fly and a devil's darnin'-needle, ez crawled up onter the box seat with me last week, and buzzed! Now I think on it, he talked high- faluten' o' the inflooence of the press and sech.I may hev said 'shoo' to him when he was hummin' the loudest.I mout hev flicked him off oncet or twicet with my whip. It must be him.
Gosh!" he said suddenly, rising and lifting his heavy hand to his forehead, "now I think agin he was the feller ez crawled under the desk when the fight was goin' on, and stayed there.Yes, sir, that was HIM.His face looked sorter familiar, but I didn't know him moultin' with his feathers off."He turned upon me with the first expression of trouble and anxiety I had ever seen him wear."Yes, sir, that's him.And I've kem--me, Yuba Bill!--kem MYSELF, a matter of twenty miles, totin' a GUN--a gun, by Gosh!--to fight that--that--that potatar-bug!" He walked to the window, turned, walked back again, finished his whiskey with a single gulp, and laid his hand almost despondingly on my shoulder."Look ye, old-- old fell, you and me's ole friends.Don't give me away. Don't let on a word o' this to any one! Say I kem down yer howlin' drunk on a gen'ral tear! Say I mistook that newspaper office for a cigar- shop, and--got licked by the boss!Say anythin' you like, 'cept that I took a gun down yer to chase a fly that had settled onter me.Keep the Left Bower in yer back office till I send for it.Ef you've got a back door somewhere handy where I can slip outer this without bein' seen I'd be thankful."As this desponding suggestion appeared to me as the wisest thing for him to do in the then threatening state of affairs outside,-- which, had he suspected it, he would have stayed to face,--I quickly opened a door into a courtyard that communicated through an alley with a side street.Here we shook hands and parted; his last dejected ejaculation being, "That potatobug!" Later I ascertained that Captain Jim had retired to his ranch some four miles distant.He was not seriously hurt, but looked, to use the words of my informant, "ez ef he'd been hugged by a playful b'ar." As the "Guardian" made its appearance the next week without the slightest allusion to the fracas, I did not deem it necessary to divulge the real facts.When I called to inquire about Captain Jim's condition, he himself, however, volunteered an explanation.
"I don't mind tellin' you, ez an old friend o' mine and Lacy's, that the secret of that there attack on me and the 'Guardian' was perlitikal.Yes, sir! There was a powerful orginization in the interest o' Halkins for assemblyman ez didn't like our high-toned editorials on caucus corruption, and hired a bully to kem down here and suppress us.Why, this yer Lacyspotted the idea to oncet; yer know how keen be is." "Was Lacy present?" I asked as carelessly as I could.
Captain Jim glanced his eyes over his shoulder quite in his old furtive canine fashion, and then blinked them at me rapidly."He war! And if it warn't for HIS pluck and HIS science and HIS strength, I don't know whar I'D hev been now! Howsomever, it's all right.I've had a fair offer to sell the 'Guardian' over at Simpson's Bar, and it's time I quit throwin' away the work of a man like Lacy Bassett upon it.And between you and me, I've got an idea and suthin' better to put his talens into."
