登陆注册
5190500000008

第8章 THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A QUACK(7)

Just as I was at my worst and in despair something always turned up, but it was sure to be risky; and now my aunt refused to see me, and Peninnah wrote me goody-goody letters, and said Aunt Rachel had been unable to find certain bank-notes she had hidden, and vowed I had taken them.This Peninnah did not think possible.I agreed with her.The notes were found somewhat later by Peninnah in the toes of a pair of my aunt's old slippers.Of course I wrote an indignant letter.My aunt declared that Peninnah had stolen the notes, and restored them when they were missed.Poor Peninnah!

This did not seem to me very likely, but Peninnah did love fine clothes.

One night, as I was debating with myself as to how I was to improve my position, Iheard a knock on my shutter, and, going to the door, let in a broad-shouldered man with a whisky face and a great hooked nose.He wore a heavy black beard and mustache, and looked like the wolf in the pictures of Red Riding-hood which I had seen as a child.

``Your name's Sanderaft?'' said the man.

``Yes; that's my name--Dr.Sanderaft.''

As he sat down he shook the snow over everything, and said coolly: ``Set down, doc;I want to talk with you.''

``What can I do for you?'' said I.

The man looked around the room rather scornfully, at the same time throwing back his coat and displaying a red neckerchief and a huge garnet pin.``Guess you're not overly rich,'' he said.

``Not especially,'' said I.``What's that your business?''

He did not answer, but merely said, ``Know Simon Stagers?''

``Can't say I do,'' said I, cautiously.Simon was a burglar who had blown off two fingers when mining a safe.I had attended him while he was hiding.

``Can't say you do.Well, you can lie, and no mistake.Come, now, doc.Simon says you're safe, and I want to have a leetle plain talk with you.''

With this he laid ten gold eagles on the table.I put out my hand instinctively.

``Let 'em alone,'' cried the man, sharply.

``They're easy earned, and ten more like 'em.''

``For doing what?'' I said.

The man paused a moment, and looked around him; next he stared at me, and loosened his cravat with a hasty pull.``You're the coroner,'' said he.

``I! What do you mean?''

``Yes, you're the coroner; don't you understand?'' and so saying, he shoved the gold pieces toward me.

``Very good,'' said I; ``we will suppose I'm the coroner.What next?''

``And being the coroner,'' said he, ``you get this note, which requests you to call at No.9Blank street to examine the body of a young man which is supposed--only supposed, you see--to have--well, to have died under suspicious circumstances.''

``Go on,'' said I.

``No,'' he returned; ``not till I know how you like it.Stagers and another knows it;and it wouldn't be very safe for you to split, besides not making nothing out of it.But what I say is this, Do you like the business of coroner?''

I did not like it; but just then two hundred in gold was life to me, so I said: ``Let me hear the whole of it first.I am safe.''

``That's square enough,'' said the man.

``My wife's got''--correcting himself with a shivery shrug--``my wife had a brother that took to cutting up rough because when I'd been up too late I handled her a leetle hard now and again.

``Luckily he fell sick with typhoid just then--you see, he lived with us.When he got better I guessed he'd drop all that; but somehow he was worse than ever--clean off his head, and strong as an ox.My wife said to put him away in an asylum.I didn't think that would do.At last he tried to get out.He was going to see the police about--well--the thing was awful serious, and my wife carrying on like mad, and wanting doctors.I had no mind to run, and something had got to be done.So Simon Stagers and I talked it over.The end of it was, he took worse of a sudden, and got so he didn't know nothing.Then I rushed for a doctor.He said it was a perforation, and there ought to have been a doctor when he was first took sick.

``Well, the man died, and as I kept about the house, my wife had no chance to talk.

The doctor fussed a bit, but at last he gave a certificate.I thought we were done with it.

But my wife she writes a note and gives it to a boy in the alley to put in the post.We suspicioned her, and Stagers was on the watch.After the boy got away a bit, Simon bribed him with a quarter to give him the note, which wasn't no less than a request to the coroner to come to the house to-morrow and make an examination, as foul play was suspected--and poison.''

When the man quit talking he glared at me.I sat still.I was cold all over.I was afraid to go on, and afraid to go back, besides which, I did not doubt that there was a good deal of money in the case.

``Of course,'' said I, ``it's nonsense; only I suppose you don't want the officers about, and a fuss, and that sort of thing.''

``Exactly,'' said my friend.``It's all bosh about poison.You're the coroner.You take this note and come to my house.Says you: `Mrs.File, are you the woman that wrote this note? Because in that case I must examine the body.' ''

``I see,'' said I; ``she needn't know who Iam, or anything else; but if I tell her it's all right, do you think she won't want to know why there isn't a jury, and so on?''

``Bless you,'' said the man, ``the girl isn't over seventeen, and doesn't know no more than a baby.As we live up-town miles away, she won't know anything about you.''

``I'll do it,'' said I, suddenly, for, as I saw, it involved no sort of risk; ``but I must have three hundred dollars.''

``And fifty,'' added the wolf, ``if you do it well.''

Then I knew it was serious.

With this the man buttoned about him a shaggy gray overcoat, and took his leave without a single word in addition.

A minute later he came back and said:

``Stagers is in this business, and I was to remind you of Lou Wilson,--I forgot that,--the woman that died last year.That's all.''

Then he went away, leaving me in a cold sweat.I knew now I had no choice.Iunderstood why I had been selected.

同类推荐
  • 金箓上寿三献仪

    金箓上寿三献仪

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 物异

    物异

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 炮炙大法

    炮炙大法

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 女科旨要

    女科旨要

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 中天竺舍卫国祇洹寺图经

    中天竺舍卫国祇洹寺图经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 九世桃缘劫

    九世桃缘劫

    自从千万年前的青丘一事,狐族中就再也没出现过九尾神狐,可随着一只小狐狸的诞生…六届的格局开始发生变化,当神族神秘的面纱被揭起,千万年前的青丘一事也逐渐被人发现。千万次的轮回,灵魂之契,堕落成魔,当年的狠心绝情和被逼无奈,到底是我的缘还是我的孽。【本文保证是宠文…1V1】新书开坑,还需大家多多爱护。
  • 凤于九天:废后醉卧美男怀

    凤于九天:废后醉卧美男怀

    新帝黎小黑登基,糟糠皇后云姽婳却因莫须有罪名被废,众大臣百般求情才保得一命,被处以墨刑和膑刑,贬为庶人。云姽婳醒来后,心灰意冷之下,决心学孔圣人周游列国,趁机好好给皇位上的男人戴个绿帽子,各种绝世美男撩不停。琴帝许濡知,棋圣张泽时,诗鬼李枫荥,画仙王潇祾,剑祖侯锦屏,师宗郑圣尧,匠尊鲁荭薄,药王赵珏庸……还有“君子世无双,陌上人如玉”的公子小白。喂,那个狠心将云姽婳处以极刑的狗皇帝,你搀和个屁呀!
  • 万古第一帝

    万古第一帝

    九天十地,万古第一!一个站在九天之上,睥睨众生的男人。
  • 下完这场雪

    下完这场雪

    地球上分划出了十个种族,这十个种族为争夺地盘,不惜发起了大战,打乱了各族的安宁,战火难以平熄,世界陷入一片混乱之中,一切都变的扑朔迷离了起来。羽族族长羽灵墨在危难时刻,展翼,在天空之中挥动着自己纯白的翅膀。以自身的灵力净化一切,使大战停歇,而自己也因此殒落。这一场大战虽停歇了,但大家都心知肚明,一切还未结束,更未开始,反而更加使事情神秘起来了。背后的迷底谁都不明白,至少现在是安宁的,只是不知这安宁祥和的背后又有多深的潭水…这一场大战使血族亲王暮夜失踪,不知去向,并且首领也换成了他弟弟夏。羽族族长羽灵墨牺牲了,且羽族圣使也不幸失明,所以羽族一切大小事务都由冰族首领冰陌尘代理,但冰陌尘因为羽灵墨的死有点郁郁寡欢,便把冰羽的一切事务交给了冰族亲王冰封管理…这一场大战是谁发起的?又是谁使这一切迷茫?暮夜去哪了?羽灵墨真的死了?羽子靖是真失明还是假的?这一切是意外还是阴谋?
  • 冰山校草太难惹

    冰山校草太难惹

    某一天,喝醉了的柳涵嫣偷溜进了温宇墨他的房间。当温宇墨从外面回来的时候,就看见了自己房间里,那一只偷偷喝酒的小猫。醉了的小猫,当着温宇墨的面跳起了“脱衣舞”,只不过被脱衣服的那个人,不是喝醉了的柳涵嫣,而是他温宇墨罢了--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 六顶思考帽

    六顶思考帽

    《六顶思考帽》所强调的是一个非常简单的概念,它只能允许思考者在同一时间内做一件事情。思考者要学会将逻辑与情感、创造与信息等区分开来。这一概念就是“六顶思考帽”的方法。戴上任意一顶帽子都代表着一种特定类型的思考方式。优秀团队和普通团队在集体智慧方面差异并不大,但在如何引导和激发集体智慧方面却是天差地别。这一方法可以帮助员工提高生产力。团队将学会怎样把思考过程分为六个不同的方向。
  • 千面杀手妃:误落龙榻

    千面杀手妃:误落龙榻

    一朝失足,他误将她当成别人,将她当礼物收了。霓裳真是觉得什么都白搭了,想她好不容易才结束了在二十一世纪的一切,还没放松过来就掉到了这莫名其妙的地方。掉了就掉了,她认了,可是为什么身边要跟着一个癞皮狗,活像个心智不足月的小娃儿。看在这货好歹还是个王爷,她又需要栖身之所,就只好暂时委屈下了。墨夷轩墨夷王朝皇帝最无法掌控却又是最受皇上器重的王子,外人眼中的无用皇子,殊不知却是掌控整个王朝命脉的人。一朝相见,那抹身影进驻他的眼里,再也逃不开。
  • 赴陆以潺潺

    赴陆以潺潺

    这么多年来,顾溪始终想不通自己为什么会和陆叙相爱,但她却意识到,在这个世界上,能让她如溪水般擅行不顾奔向的人,除了陆叙,再无他人。
  • 星灵,起源

    星灵,起源

    林袖清本是万千学生中普普通通的一员,每天在学校,家,辅导班这三点一线间忙碌,直到一次意外事故的发生。让他窥见了这世间的本质:万物皆有灵,星球亦有灵,哪怕是自己都不过是其他星球的一片灵魂碎片。而随着他对星灵的认知不断加深,灾难也接踵而至,星灵的世界到底有着什么,即将揭晓。
  • 做人做事好心态:决定人生成败的66个细节

    做人做事好心态:决定人生成败的66个细节

    心态决定命运播下一种好心态,收获一种好思想;播下一种好思想,收获一种好行为;播下一种好行为,收获一种好习惯;播下一种好习惯,收获一种好性格;播下一种好性格,收获一种好命运。