登陆注册
5201300000015

第15章

The advance of regret can be so gradual that it is impossible to say "yesterday I was happy, today I am not." At no one moment did Lilia realize that her marriage was a failure; yet during the summer and autumn she became as unhappy as it was possible for her nature to be.She had no unkind treatment, and few unkind words, from her husband.He simply left her alone.In the morning he went out to do "business," which, as far as she could discover, meant sitting in the Farmacia.He usually returned to lunch, after which he retired to another room and slept.

In the evening he grew vigorous again, and took the air on the ramparts, often having his dinner out, and seldom returning till midnight or later.

There were, of course, the times when he was away altogether--at Empoli, Siena, Florence, Bologna--for he delighted in travel, and seemed to pick up friends all over the country.Lilia often heard what a favorite he was.

She began to see that she must assert herself, but she could not see how.Her self-confidence, which had overthrown Philip, had gradually oozed away.If she left the strange house there was the strange little town.If she were to disobey her husband and walk in the country, that would be stranger still--vast slopes of olives and vineyards, with chalk-white farms, and in the distance other slopes, with more olives and more farms, and more little towns outlined against the cloudless sky."I don't call this country," she would say.

"Why, it's not as wild as Sawston Park!" And, indeed, there was scarcely a touch of wildness in it--some of those slopes had been under cultivation for two thousand years.But it was terrible and mysterious all the same, and its continued presence made Lilia so uncomfortable that she forgot her nature and began to reflect.

She reflected chiefly about her marriage.

The ceremony had been hasty and expensive, and the rites, whatever they were, were not those of the Church of England.Lilia had no religion in her; but for hours at a time she would be seized with a vulgar fear that she was not "married properly," and that her social position in the next world might be as obscure as it was in this.It might be safer to do the thing thoroughly, and one day she took the advice of Spiridione and joined the Roman Catholic Church, or as she called it, "Santa Deodata's."Gino approved; he, too, thought it safer, and it was fun confessing, though the priest was a stupid old man, and the whole thing was a good slap in the face for the people at home.

The people at home took the slap very soberly; indeed, there were few left for her to give it to.The Herritons were out of the question; they would not even let her write to Irma, though Irma was occasionally allowed to write to her.Mrs.Theobald was rapidly subsiding into dotage, and, as far as she could be definite about anything, had definitely sided with the Herritons.And Miss Abbott did likewise.

Night after night did Lilia curse this false friend, who had agreed with her that the marriage would "do," and that the Herritons would come round to it, and then, at the first hint of opposition, had fled back to England shrieking and distraught.Miss Abbott headed the long list of those who should never be written to, and who should never be forgiven.

Almost the only person who was not on that list was Mr.Kingcroft, who had unexpectedly sent an affectionate and inquiring letter.He was quite sure never to cross the Channel, and Lilia drew freely on her fancy in the reply.

At first she had seen a few English people, for Monteriano was not the end of the earth.One or two inquisitive ladies, who had heard at home of her quarrel with the Herritons, came to call.

She was very sprightly, and they thought her quite unconventional, and Gino a charming boy, so all that was to the good.But by May the season, such as it was, had finished, and there would be no one till next spring.As Mrs.Herriton had often observed, Lilia had no resources.

She did not like music, or reading, or work.Her one qualification for life was rather blowsy high spirits, which turned querulous or boisterous according to circumstances.She was not obedient, but she was cowardly, and in the most gentle way, which Mrs.Herriton might have envied, Gino made her do what he wanted.At first it had been rather fun to let him get the upper hand.But it was galling to discover that he could not do otherwise.He had a good strong will when he chose to use it, and would not have had the least scruple in using bolts and locks to put it into effect.There was plenty of brutality deep down in him, and one day Lilia nearly touched it.

It was the old question of going out alone.

"I always do it in England."

"This is Italy."

"Yes, but I'm older than you, and I'll settle.""I am your husband," he said, smiling.They had finished their mid-day meal, and he wanted to go and sleep.Nothing would rouse him up, until at last Lilia, getting more and more angry, said, "And I've got the money."He looked horrified.

Now was the moment to assert herself.She made the statement again.He got up from his chair.

"And you'd better mend your manners," she continued, "for you'd find it awkward if I stopped drawing cheques."She was no reader of character, but she quickly became alarmed.As she said to Perfetta afterwards, "None of his clothes seemed to fit--too big in one place, too small in another."His figure rather than his face altered, the shoulders falling forward till his coat wrinkled across the back and pulled away from his wrists.

He seemed all arms.He edged round the table to where she was sitting, and she sprang away and held the chair between them, too frightened to speak or to move.He looked at her with round, expressionless eyes, and slowly stretched out his left hand.

Perfetta was heard coming up from the kitchen.

It seemed to wake him up, and he turned away and went to his room without a word.

"What has happened?" cried Lilia, nearly fainting.

"He is ill--ill."

Perfetta looked suspicious when she heard the account.

"What did you say to him?" She crossed herself.

同类推荐
  • 益智录

    益智录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 寺塔记

    寺塔记

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 荆釵记

    荆釵记

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 对山医话

    对山医话

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 莲修起信录

    莲修起信录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 瓜洲闻晓角

    瓜洲闻晓角

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 都市之不朽主宰

    都市之不朽主宰

    什么?你是重生武帝?你有至高系统?你是不死之躯,能够无限复活?“不好意思,我不是针对谁,我是说在座的各位都是辣鸡。”不朽存在,仙界归来,执掌天命,万道匍匐。
  • 梦境归来做才子

    梦境归来做才子

    曾梦见格莱美放声高歌,曾梦见嘎纳手捧金棕榈,曾梦见诺贝尔颁奖现场发表演讲,曾梦见建国初期全民一心,曾梦见武侠世界江湖逍遥,曾梦见末世来临丧尸横行,曾梦见仙佛争锋踏剑遨游......梦想照进现实,梦境归来,传奇人生从此刻开始!天籁之音,如椽巨笔,演技非凡,才高八斗,点石成金,这都不是梦想。歌坛天王,畅销作家,国际影帝,著名导演,商界巨擘,莫正阳集于一身!国民才子,霸道来袭!
  • 薄欢

    薄欢

    蔻色出生于江南小镇,五岁时父母离异,跟随奶奶在小镇生活,与嘉年就此结识,父亲工作调动,蔻色离开了小镇,与嘉年天各一方。数年后,奶奶病重,蔻色回到小镇,在音乐社团的嘉年却不认得她了,而他身边也已经有了叶绛心。绛心看到追梦疲累的嘉年数次劝说要嘉年陪她出国,一心为了追求梦想的嘉年留在了大陆,与绛心就此分开。那些辛苦的岁月,陪在他身边的是蔻色,兜兜转转,两人终成眷属。继安妮宝贝之后,华丽文风与澄澈情感的最完美结合。一本惘然之书,写给那些在少年时光里被爱珍惜过被亏欠过的人看。
  • 曾国藩家书

    曾国藩家书

    “烽火连三月,家书抵万金”。本书收入曾国藩家书126封,都是他在为官从政、操持防务,或奔走于驿道水路上的亲笔所书。既阐述伦理纲常,又慨叹人生艰辛,还劝勉后人精进,表达心事衷曲,言之凿凿,情意绵绵,实为后辈修身育人、捧读不倦之佳作。
  • 我之信仰于你

    我之信仰于你

    夏安同学在学校同学眼中一直都是性格孤僻且脾气不太好的超级学霸女神,直到有一天一个转学生的到来才让他们真正的知道了这个在他们眼中的如此优秀的学霸不为人知的一面…… 我知道其他人知道的你,也知道其他人不知道的你。我的信仰啊,夏安同学。——慕光
  • 甜蜜娇宠

    甜蜜娇宠

    “点点,吃早饭了。”安点点,身高165厘米,体重50公斤,长发,还不错的大学刚毕业不久。从小到大平平,有过默默无名,有过老师宠爱,有过同学斗气,也有过很多朋友爱。干过小组长,做过大班长,当过学生会主席,也做过劳动委员,不后悔做过的每一件事,就是一直在思考为什么没有当过体委呢,她的体育也是不错的。爱笑,有整齐又雪白的牙齿,甜甜的酒窝,眼睛不大也不小,可是黑黑的瞳仁里鬼点子不少。好吧且先到这里,什么什……
  • 一品嫡女:皇帝难伺候

    一品嫡女:皇帝难伺候

    现代的天才女学霸意外穿越,成了将军府懦弱无能的嫡女,上有凶狠霸道一手遮天的庶母,下有貌美如花心如蛇蝎的庶妹。幸好,她已经脱胎换骨,不再是之前那个备受欺凌的懦弱女。庶母算计,反咬一口,庶妹陷害,直接踹飞!还有那个一天到晚没事找事针锋相对的渣男皇帝,姑奶奶的拳头可不是吃素的,惹急了,一拳打歪你的俊脸,一脚踢爆成太监,然后休夫!--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 潜书

    潜书

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Alcestis

    Alcestis

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。