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第7章

Everyone, indeed, loved this young man wherever he went, and it was so from his earliest childhood.When he entered the household of his patron and benefactor, Yefim Petrovitch Polenov, he gained the hearts of all the family, so that they looked on him quite as their own child.Yet he entered the house at such a tender age that he could not have acted from design nor artfulness in winning affection.So that the gift of making himself loved directly and unconsciously was inherent in him, in his very nature, so to speak.It was the same at school, though he seemed to be just one of those children who are distrusted, sometimes ridiculed, and even disliked by their schoolfellows.He was dreamy, for instance, and rather solitary.

From his earliest childhood he was fond of creeping into a corner to read, and yet he was a general favourite all the while he was at school.He was rarely playful or merry, but anyone could see at the first glance that this was not from any sullenness.On the contrary he was bright and good-tempered.He never tried to show off among his schoolfellows.Perhaps because of this, he was never afraid of anyone, yet the boys immediately understood that he was not proud of his fearlessness and seemed to be unaware that he was bold and courageous.

He never resented an insult.It would happen that an hour after the offence he would address the offender or answer some question with as trustful and candid an expression as though nothing had happened between them.And it was not that he seemed to have forgotten or intentionally forgiven the affront, but simply that he did not regard it as an affront, and this completely conquered and captivated the boys.He had one characteristic which made all his schoolfellows from the bottom class to the top want to mock at him, not from malice but because it amused them.This characteristic was a wild fanatical modesty and chastity.He could not bear to hear certain words and certain conversations about women.There are "certain" words and conversations unhappily impossible to eradicate in schools.Boys pure in mind and heart, almost children, are fond of talking in school among themselves, and even aloud, of things, pictures, and images of which even soldiers would sometimes hesitate to speak.More than that, much that soldiers have no knowledge or conception of is familiar to quite young children of our intellectual and higher classes.There is no moral depravity, no real corrupt inner cynicism in it, but there is the appearance of it, and it is often looked upon among them as something refined, subtle, daring, and worthy of imitation.Seeing that Alyosha Karamazov put his fingers in his ears when they talked of "that," they used sometimes to crowd round him, pull his hands away, and shout nastiness into both ears, while he struggled, slipped to the floor, tried to hide himself without uttering one word of abuse, enduring their insults in silence.But at last they left him alone and gave up taunting him with being a "regular girl," and what's more they looked upon it with compassion as a weakness.He was always one of the best in the class but was never first.

At the time of Yefim Petrovitch's death Alyosha had two more years to complete at the provincial gymnasium.The inconsolable widow went almost immediately after his death for a long visit to Italy with her whole family, which consisted only of women and girls.Alyosha went to live in the house of two distant relations of Yefim Petrovitch, ladies whom he had never seen before.On what terms she lived with them he did not know himself.It was very characteristic of him, indeed, that he never cared at whose expense he was living.In that respect he was a striking contrast to his elder brother Ivan, who struggled with poverty for his first two years in the university, maintained himself by his own efforts, and had from childhood been bitterly conscious of living at the expense of his benefactor.But this strange trait in Alyosha's character must not, I think, criticised too severely, for at the slightest acquaintance with him anyone would have perceived that Alyosha was one of those youths, almost of the type of religious enthusiast, who, if they were suddenly to come into possession of a large fortune, would not hesitate to give it away for the asking, either for good works or perhaps to a clever rogue.In general he seemed scarcely to know the value of money, not, of course, in a literal sense.When he was given pocket-money, which he never asked for, he was either terribly careless of it so that it was gone in a moment, or he kept it for weeks together, not knowing what to do with it.

In later years Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov, a man very sensitive on the score of money and bourgeois honesty, pronounced the following judgment, after getting to know Alyosha:

"Here is perhaps the one man in the world whom you might leave alone without a penny, in the centre of an unknown town of a million inhabitants, and he would not come to harm, he would not die of cold and hunger, for he would be fed and sheltered at once; and if he were not, he would find a shelter for himself, and it would cost him no effort or humiliation.And to shelter him would be no burden, but, on the contrary, would probably be looked on as a pleasure."He did not finish his studies at the gymnasium.A year before the end of the course he suddenly announced to the ladies that he was going to see his father about a plan which had occurred to him.

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