His having kept this great news for the last,having had such a card up his sleeve and not floated it out in the current of his chatter and the luxury of their leisure,was one of those incalculable strokes by which he could still affect her;the kind of thing that reminded her of the latent force that had ejected the drunken soldier--an example of the profundity of which his promotion was the proof.She listened a while in silence,on this occasion,to the wafted strains of the music;she took it in as she had not quite done before that her future was now constituted.Mr.
Mudge was distinctly her fate;yet at this moment she turned her face quite away from him,showing him so long a mere quarter of her cheek that she at last again heard his voice.He couldn't see a pair of tears that were partly the reason of her delay to give him the assurance he required;but he expressed at a venture the hope that she had had her fill of Cocker's.
She was finally able to turn back."Oh quite.There's nothing going on.No one comes but the Americans at Thrupp's,and they don't do much.They don't seem to have a secret in the world.""Then the extraordinary reason you've been giving me for holding on there has ceased to work?"She thought a moment."Yes,that one.I've seen the thing through--I've got them all in my pocket.""So you're ready to come?"
For a little again she made no answer."No,not yet,all the same.
I've still got a reason--a different one."
He looked her all over as if it might have been something she kept in her mouth or her glove or under her jacket--something she was even sitting upon."Well,I'll have it,please.""I went out the other night and sat in the Park with a gentleman,"she said at last.
Nothing was ever seen like his confidence in her and she wondered a little now why it didn't irritate her.It only gave her ease and space,as she felt,for telling him the whole truth that no one knew.It had arrived at present at her really wanting to do that,and yet to do it not in the least for Mr.Mudge,but altogether and only for herself.This truth filled out for her there the whole experience about to relinquish,suffused and coloured it as a picture that she should keep and that,describe it as she might,no one but herself would ever really see.Moreover she had no desire whatever to make Mr.Mudge jealous;there would be no amusement in it,for the amusement she had lately known had spoiled her for lower pleasures.There were even no materials for it.The odd thing was how she never doubted that,properly handled,his passion was poisonable;what had happened was that he had cannily selected a partner with no poison to distil.She read then and there that she should never interest herself in anybody as to whom some other sentiment,some superior view,wouldn't be sure to interfere for him with jealousy."And what did you get out of that?"he asked with a concern that was not in the least for his honour.
"Nothing but a good chance to promise him I wouldn't forsake him.
He's one of my customers."
"Then it's for him not to forsake YOU."
"Well,he won't.It's all right.But I must just keep on as long as he may want me.""Want you to sit with him in the Park?"
"He may want me for that--but I shan't.I rather liked it,but once,under the circumstances,is enough.I can do better for him in another manner.""And what manner,pray?"
"Well,elsewhere."
"Elsewhere?--I SAY!"
