登陆注册
5244500000011

第11章 IV(2)

"While the weekly papers was having chalk-plate cuts of me and Andy we wired an employment agency in Chicago to express us f.o.b., six professors immediately--one English literature, one up-to-date dead languages, one chemistry, one political economy--democrat preferred-- one logic, and one wise to painting, Italian and music, with union card. The Esperanza bank guaranteed salaries, which was to run between $800 and $800.50.

"Well, sir, we finally got in shape. Over the front door was carved the words: 'The World's University; Peters & Tucker, Patrons and Proprietors. And when September the first got a cross-mark on the calendar, the come-ons begun to roll in. First the faculty got off the tri-weekly express from Tucson. They was mostly young, spectacled, and red-headed, with sentiments divided between ambition and food. Andy and me got 'em billeted on the Floresvillians and then laid for the students.

"They came in bunches. We had advertised the University in all the state papers, and it did us good to see how quick the country responded. Two hundred and nineteen husky lads aging along from 18 up to chin whiskers answered the clarion call of free education. They ripped open that town, sponged the seams, turned it, lined it with new mohair; and you couldn't have told it from Harvard or Goldfields at the March term of court.

"They marched up and down the streets waving flags with the World's University colors--ultra-marine and blue--and they certainly made a lively place of Floresville. Andy made them a speech from the balcony of the Skyview Hotel, and the whole town was out celebrating.

"In about two weeks the professors got the students disarmed and herded into classes. I don't believe there's any pleasure equal to being a philanthropist. Me and Andy bought high silk hats and pretended to dodge the two reporters of the Floresville Gazette. The paper had a man to kodak us whenever we appeared on the street, and ran our pictures every week over the column headed 'Educational Notes.' Andy lectured twice a week at the University; and afterward I would rise and tell a humorous story. Once the Gazette printed my pictures with Abe Lincoln on one side and Marshall P. Wilder on the other.

"Andy was as interested in philanthropy as I was. We used to wake up of nights and tell each other new ideas for booming the University.

"'Andy,' says I to him one day, 'there's something we overlooked. The boys ought to have dromedaries.'

"'What's that?' Andy asks.

"'Why, something to sleep in, of course,' says I. 'All colleges have 'em.'

"'Oh, you mean pajamas,' says Andy.

"'I do not,' says I. 'I mean dromedaries.' But I never could make Andy understand; so we never ordered 'em. Of course, I meant them long bedrooms in colleges where the scholars sleep in a row.

"Well, sir, the World's University was a success. We had scholars from five States and territories, and Floresville had a boom. A new shooting gallery and a pawn shop and two more saloons started; and the boys got up a college yell that went this way:

"'Raw, raw, raw, Done, done, done, Peters, Tucker, Lots of fun, Bow-wow-wow, Haw-hee-haw, World University, Hip, hurrah!'

"The scholars was a fine lot of young men, and me and Andy was as proud of 'em as if they belonged to our own family.

"But one day about the last of October Andy comes to me and asks if I have any idea how much money we had left in the bank. I guesses about sixteen thousand. 'Our balance,' says Andy, 'is $821.62.'

"'What!' says I, with a kind of a yell. 'Do you mean to tell me that them infernal clod-hopping, dough-headed, pup-faced, goose-brained, gate-stealing, rabbit-eared sons of horse thieves have soaked us for that much?'

"'No less,' says Andy.

"'Then, to Helvetia with philanthropy,' says I.

同类推荐
  • 小八义

    小八义

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 总论

    总论

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 稽神录

    稽神录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 佛说持世陀罗尼经

    佛说持世陀罗尼经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Wolfville

    Wolfville

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 亚瑟王的综漫之旅

    亚瑟王的综漫之旅

    穿越成阿尔托莉雅.潘德拉贡(女)带着系统的综漫旅行事先声明,本书不嫁人(八成没有不会写感情戏九成单身文。)1斗罗3(一小段)2FGO特异点f3我的世界4Fatezero5卡美洛6斗罗3天海联盟大比7卡美洛VS卡美洛 8斗气大陆 9精灵宝可梦 10第七特异点最终魔兽战线魔改 11游戏人生5000年前(一小段) 12FGO冠位神殿 13约会大作战里的圣杯战争 14崩坏3(卡莲奥托时期) 15从零开始的异世界生活书友群,群聊号码:965053610,顺带一提,我不是群主,是个书友创的,所以他经常会改问题,要是进群的问题和本书没关系的话,等第二天,我每天都会修改一次的。 这些剧情下面剧情世界与剧情世界的中间在后面一般都有其他的一些小剧情。 建议在41章或者61章又或者是105章的时候开始看,从头开始看的话会出现,因为作者是萌新写手的原因,写文的时候自嗨过头,前面世界各种乱穿很乱,劝退极高,41章后就没有太多这种结果(作者自以为) 精灵宝可梦章可以选择不看,劝退极高。 简介修改时间:2020:2:16
  • 执法总监张培梅

    执法总监张培梅

    崞县属雁门,从清灭亡到中华人民共和国建立的半世纪间,军阀混战,日寇侵入,战事频繁,烽火连天,时势造就英雄,战时培养将军。张培梅便是其中之一。
  • 现代社会想象

    现代社会想象

    查尔斯·泰勒 加拿大哲学家,晚近英语哲学的关键人物之一,社群主义的主将,现任加拿大麦基尔大学哲学与政治科学教授。20世纪70年代以来,泰勒以其对黑格尔哲学的再解读、对原子主义式的消极自由的批评、对社会价值的强调、对西方文化中自我认同观念发展的梳理,以及对文化多元论的论证,强烈影响着西方思想界。
  • 守望樱花的爱

    守望樱花的爱

    多年等待只因有你承诺,孤身守候笑看樱花盛开!
  • 翻毛皮鞋

    翻毛皮鞋

    腊月的风很硬,吹到脸上麻辣辣的,有破皮的感觉。田里的活没有了,婆娘们整天待在家里缝补拆洗、烧烧煮煮。男人们是闲不下来的,都被队长派去水利工地挖河打坝。这天吃过早饭,李想把孩子安顿到公婆家,将罐子里的几个鸡蛋掏出来,小心地放入布兜。她从挂衣绳上抽下头巾,把脸包扎起来,拎上布兜就出门去了。今天不逢集,但李想必须上街。家里的盐罐子空了,饭寡淡得无法下咽,她要去镇街兑换盐。鸡蛋是家里的两只小母鸡生的,日积月累一直藏着,一家人都没舍得吃。李想本想多养几只鸡,有了鸡家里的油盐酱醋、针头线脑就不用发愁。
  • 没有不该承担的责任,只有不愿承担的责任

    没有不该承担的责任,只有不愿承担的责任

    不论是楔形文字,还是象形文字;不论古今,还是中外;不论家庭,还是职场。历史的变迁、地域的隔阂、工作的转换……却不妨碍我们对责任相同的理解,责任是人生命的一部分,应该承担的任务,应该完成的使命,应该承担的后果。
  • 低手不凡

    低手不凡

    少年自山上而来,拥有最神秘的体质,万千敌人在他面前如纸糊泡沫,一拳轰破。最霸道的功法,最神秘的职业,铁血少年征战不休,撑起都市至尊的封号,笑傲都市。
  • TFBOYS十年初夏依旧等你

    TFBOYS十年初夏依旧等你

    买奶茶抽到音乐会门票,手气爆好的姜逸欣果断的决定回国,不仅是为了看音乐会,更是在中国追逐自己的小提琴家梦想,然而,一个中介卷着钱跑了之后一套房竟然有两个业主?奇奇怪怪,本以为没有交集的他们竟然纠缠终生…当钢琴女神林初薇被无尽的等候磨灭了希望,当逆袭学霸范瑾萱放下过去那段坎坷的情缘,谁曾记否,那个一起看过日落和大海的人?
  • 哥是试工帝

    哥是试工帝

    本书作者为哥,书中的哥的试工经验部分虚构,大部分为真实亲身体验,因哥被骗试工多次,屡败屡试,屡试屡败,故在试工方面经验丰富,自称为试工帝,望各位多多包涵!哥以清晰真实的语句和严厉的措辞抨击社会真实而黑暗的一面,当中也不缺幸福的生活场景,但每次试工均以杯具结束,希望和仍在试工同仁共勉!和未试工的人一起鼓起勇气面对失败!和试过工后或爽或不爽的各位一起开怀大笑!
  • 世界最具品味性的小品随笔(4)

    世界最具品味性的小品随笔(4)

    我的课外第一本书——震撼心灵阅读之旅经典文库,《阅读文库》编委会编。通过各种形式的故事和语言,讲述我们在成长中需要的知识。