The Oblong During the following week the work at `The Cave' progressed rapidly towards completion, although, the hours of daylight being so few, the men worked only from 8 A.M.till 4 P.M.and they had their breakfasts before they came.This made 40 hours a week, so that those who were paid sevenpence an hour earned ?.3.4.Those who got sixpence-halfpenny drew ?.1.8.Those whose wages were fivepence an hour were paid the princely sum of 16/8d.for their week's hard labour, and those whose rate was fourpence-halfpenny `picked up' 15/-.
And yet there are people who have the insolence to say that Drink is the cause of poverty.
And many of the persons who say this, spend more money than that on drink themselves - every day of their useless lives.
By Tuesday night all the inside was finished with the exception of the kitchen and scullery.The painting of the kitchen had been delayed owing to the non-arrival of the new cooking range, and the scullery was still used as the paint shop.The outside work was also nearly finished: all the first coating was done and the second coating was being proceeded with.According to the specification, all the outside woodwork was supposed to have three coats, and the guttering, rain-pipes and other ironwork two coats, but Crass and Hunter had arranged to make two coats do for most of the windows and woodwork, and all the ironwork was to be made to do with one coat only.The windows were painted in two colours: the sashes dark green and the frames white.All the rest - gables, doors, railings, guttering, etc.-was dark green; and all the dark green paint was made with boiled linseed oil and varnish; no turpentine being allowed to be used on this part of the work.
`This is some bloody fine stuff to 'ave to use, ain't it?' remarked Harlow to Philpot on Wednesday morning.`It's more like a lot of treacle than anything else.'
`Yes: and it won't arf blister next summer when it gets a bit of sun on it,' replied Philpot with a grin.
`I suppose they're afraid that if they was to put a little turps in, it wouldn't bear out, and they'd 'ave to give it another coat.'
`You can bet yer life that's the reason,' said Philpot.`But all the same I mean to pinch a drop to put in mine as soon as Crass is gorn.'
`Gorn where?'
`Why, didn't you know? there's another funeral on today? Didn't you see that corfin plate what Owen was writing in the drorin'-room last Saturday morning?'
`No, I wasn't 'ere.Don't you remember I was sent away to do a ceilin' and a bit of painting over at Windley?'
`Oh, of course; I forgot,' exclaimed Philpot.
`I reckon Crass and Slyme must be making a small fortune out of all these funerals,' said Harlow.`This makes the fourth in the last fortnight.What is it they gets for 'em?'
`A shillin' for taking' 'ome the corfin and liftin' in the corpse, and four bob for the funeral - five bob altogether.'
`That's a bit of all right, ain't it?' said Harlow.`A couple of them in a week besides your week's wages, eh? Five bob for two or three hours work!'
`Yes, the money's all right, mate, but they're welcome to it for my part.I don't want to go messin' about with no corpses,' replied Philpot with a shudder.
`Who is this last party what's dead?' asked Harlow after a pause.
`It's a parson what used to belong to the "Shining Light" Chapel.
He'd been abroad for 'is 'ollerdays - to Monte Carlo.It seems 'e was ill before 'e went away, but the change did 'im a lot of good; in fact, 'e was quite recovered, and 'e was coming back again.But while 'e was standin' on the platform at Monte Carlo Station waitin' for the train, a porter runned into 'im with a barrer load o' luggage, and 'e blowed up.'
`Blowed up?'
`Yes,' repeated Philpot.`Blowed up! Busted! Exploded! All into pieces.But they swep' 'em all up and put it in a corfin and it's to be planted this afternoon.'
Harlow maintained an awestruck silence, and Philpot continued:
`I had a drink the other night with a butcher bloke what used to serve this parson with meat, and we was talkin' about what a strange sort of death it was, but 'e said 'e wasn't at all surprised to 'ear of it;the only thing as 'e wondered at was that the man didn't blow up long ago, considerin' the amount of grub as 'e used to make away with.He ses the quantities of stuff as 'e's took there and seen other tradesmen take was something chronic.Tons of it!'
`What was the parson's name?' asked Harlow.
`Belcher.You must 'ave noticed 'im about the town.A very fat chap,' replied Philpot.`I'm sorry you wasn't 'ere on Saturday to see the corfin plate.Frank called me in to see the wordin' when 'e'd finished it.It had on: "Jonydab Belcher.Born January 1st, 1849.
Ascended, December 8th, 19--"'
`Oh, I know the bloke now!' cried Harlow.`I remember my youngsters bringin' 'ome a subscription list what they'd got up at the Sunday School to send 'im away for a 'ollerday because 'e was ill, and I gave 'em a penny each to put on their cards because I didn't want 'em to feel mean before the other young 'uns.'
`Yes, it's the same party.Two or three young 'uns asked me to give 'em something to put on at the time.And I see they've got another subscription list on now.I met one of Newman's children yesterday and she showed it to me.It's for an entertainment and a Christmas Tree for all the children what goes to the Sunday School, so I didn't mind giving just a trifle for anything like that.'...
`Seems to be gettin' colder, don't it?'
`It's enough to freeze the ears orf a brass monkey!' remarked Easton as he descended from a ladder close by and, placing his pot of paint on the pound, began to try to warm his hands by rubbing and beating them together.
He was trembling, and his teeth were chattering with cold.
`I could just do with a nice pint of beer, now,' he said as he stamped his feet on the pound.
`That's just what I was thinkin',' said Philpot, wistfully, 'and what's more, I mean to 'ave one, too, at dinner-time.I shall nip down to the "Cricketers".Even if I don't get back till a few minutes after one, it won't matter, because Crass and Nimrod will be gorn to the funeral.'
