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第189章

Companionless, unsatisfied, forlorn, I sit here in this lonely tower, and look Upon the lake below me, and the hills That swoon with heat, and see as in a vision All my past life unroll itself before me.

The princes and the merchants come to me, Merchants of Tyre and Princes of Damascus.

And pass, and disappear, and are no more;But leave behind their merchandise and jewels, Their perfumes, and their gold, and their disgust.

I loathe them, and the very memory of them Is unto me as thought of food to one Cloyed with the luscious figs of Dalmanutha!

What if hereafter, in the long hereafter Of endless joy or pain, or joy in pain, It were my punishment to be with them Grown hideous and decrepit in their sins, And hear them say: Thou that hast brought us here, Be unto us as thou hast been of old!

I look upon this raiment that I wear, These silks, and these embroideries, and they seem Only as cerements wrapped about my limbs!

I look upon these rings thick set with pearls, And emerald and amethyst and jasper, And they are burning coals upon my flesh!

This serpent on my wrist becomes alive!

Away, thou viper! and away, ye garlands, Whose odors bring the swift remembrance back Of the unhallowed revels in these chambers!

But yesterday,--and yet it seems to me Something remote, like a pathetic song Sung long ago by minstrels in the street,--But yesterday, as from this tower I gazed, Over the olive and the walnut trees Upon the lake and the white ships, and wondered Whither and whence they steered, and who was in them, A fisher's boat drew near the landing-place Under the oleanders, and the people Came up from it, and passed beneath the tower, Close under me.In front of them, as leader, Walked one of royal aspect, clothed in white, Who lifted up his eyes, and looked at me, And all at once the air seemed filled and living With a mysterious power, that streamed from him, And overflowed me with an atmosphere Of light and love.As one entranced I stood, And when I woke again, lo! he was gone;So that I said: Perhaps it is a dream.

But from that very hour the seven demons That had their habitation in this body Which men call beautiful, departed from me!

This morning, when the first gleam of the dawn Made Lebanon a glory in the air, And all below was darkness, I beheld An angel, or a spirit glorified, With wind-tossed garments walking on the lake.

The face I could not see, but I distinguished The attitude and gesture, and I knew 'T was he that healed me.And the gusty wind Brought to mine ears a voice, which seemed to say:

Be of good cheer! 'T is I! Be not afraid!

And from the darkness, scarcely heard, the answer:

If it be thou, bid me come unto thee Upon the water! And the voice said: Come!

And then I heard a cry of fear: Lord, save me!

As of a drowning man.And then the voice:

Why didst thou doubt, O thou of little faith!

At this all vanished, and the wind was hushed, And the great sun came up above the hills, And the swift-flying vapors hid themselves In caverns among the rocks! Oh, I must find him And follow him, and be with him forever!

Thou box of alabaster, in whose walls The souls of flowers lie pent, the precious balm And spikenard of Arabian farms, the spirits Of aromatic herbs, ethereal natures Nursed by the sun and dew, not all unworthy To bathe his consecrated feet, whose step Makes every threshold holy that he crosses;Let us go forth upon our pilgrimage, Thou and I only! Let us search for him Until we find him, and pour out our souls Before his feet, till all that's left of us Shall be the broken caskets that once held us!

X

THE HOUSE OF SIMON THE PHARISEE

A GUEST at table.

Are ye deceived? Have any of the Rulers Believed on him? or do they know indeed This man to be the very Christ? Howbeit We know whence this man is, but when the Christ Shall come, none knoweth whence he is.

CHRISTUS.

Whereunto shall I liken, then, the men Of this generation? and what are they like?

They are like children sitting in the markets, And calling unto one another, saying:

We have piped unto you, and ye have not danced We have mourned unto you, and ye have not wept!

This say I unto you, for John the Baptist Came neither eating bread nor drinking wine Ye say he hath a devil.The Son of Man Eating and drinking cometh, and ye say:

Behold a gluttonous man, and a wine-bibber;Behold a friend of publicans and sinners!

A GUEST aside to SIMON.

Who is that woman yonder, gliding in So silently behind him?

SIMON.

It is Mary, Who dwelleth in the Tower of Magdala.

THE GUEST.

See, how she kneels there weeping, and her tears Fall on his feet; and her long, golden hair Waves to and fro and wipes them dry again.

And now she kisses them, and from a box Of alabaster is anointing them With precious ointment, filling all the house With its sweet odor!

SIMON, aside, Oh, this man, forsooth, Were he indeed a Prophet, would have known Who and what manner of woman this may be That toucheth him! would know she is a sinner!

CHRISTUS.

Simon, somewhat have I to say to thee.

SIMON.

Master, say on.

CHRISTUS.

A certain creditor Had once two debtors; and the one of them Owed him five hundred pence; the other, fifty.

They having naught to pay withal, he frankly Forgave them both.Now tell me which of them Will love him most?

SIMON.

He, I suppose to whom He most forgave.

CHRISTUS.

Yea, thou hast rightly judged.

Seest thou this woman? When thine house I entered, Thou gavest me no water for my feet, But she hath washed them with her tears, and wiped them With her own hair.Thou gavest me no kiss;This woman hath not ceased, since I came in, To kiss my feet.My head with oil didst thou Anoint not; but this woman hath anointed My feet with ointment.Hence I say to thee, Her sins, which have been many, are forgiven, For she loved much.

THE GUESTS.

Oh, who, then, is this man That pardoneth also sins without atonement?

CHRISTUS.

Woman, thy faith hath saved thee! Go in peace!

THE SECOND PASSOVER.

I

BEFORE THE GATES OF MACHAERUS

MANAHEM.

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