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11,002 Things to Be Miserable About
11,002 Things to Be Miserable About is a list of all the reasons NOT to wake up in the morning. Ironically enough, when you put all of them under one cover, it's actually very funny. This decidedly absurd inventory of misery is perfect for sardonic and disaffected youth, for people seeking gifts for Traumatic Event Birthdays (like 21, 25, 30, 40, and, well, anything after 40), and for anyone else with an offbeat sense of humor. Enjoy. Some of the entries are pretty basic, like imitation crabmeat, student loans, and David Hasselhoff, but other entries actually include educational things, like: Dust mites, which make up one-third of the weight of a six-year-old pillow. See, you can laugh and learn.逆天神妃至上
本文女扮男装,双强爽文,欢迎跳坑!“他”,曾是慕家最耀眼的天才,人人艳羡,不可追赶。“他”,也是慕家最耻辱的存在,筋脉尽毁,沦为废人!从云端跌落尘埃,被家族驱逐,受尽欺凌!殊不知凤凰涅槃,浴火重生!一朝觉醒,天地震荡!翻手为云,覆手为雨,凝元力,炼神体,契神兽,汇星辰之力,掌天下乾坤!慕家三少,绝世风姿,更是引得无数人疯狂追逐!当站在最高的位置,众人仰望,方知——“他”,竟是她!他,背景神秘,实力莫测,清绝卓然,骄傲至极,却唯独对那一人,放不下,舍不得。千万人追随他,而他,只追随那一人!那颗绝世明珠,唯我——捧于掌中!绽放万千光华!片段一:慕三少笑眯眯:“云少主,不好意思,这一次,本少又抢在你前面了,这神兽丹…”云翊波澜不惊:“归你。”慕三少笑意更浓:“云少主真是好气魄。那咱们一同找到的这元神液…“云翊凤眸微垂:“归你。“慕三少笑的合不拢嘴:“云少主当真豪杰!虽说这上古神诀乃是你先找到,但本少也出力…”云翊眸色深深:“归你。““凡是你想要的,只要我有,便都归你。”慕三少笑容一滞。“不过…“不待慕三少反应过来,云翊便是抬眸,盯着慕三少,一字一句道:“你——归我!”片段二:慕三少知道自己生的好,招蜂引蝶是难免的。但她没想过招来云翊这么一个妖孽。容貌妖孽,背景妖孽,天赋妖孽,连兴趣也这么妖孽!追追逃逃折腾良久,慕三少终于决定和他好好谈谈。“云少主,”慕三少艰难开口,“我是个男人,你也是个男人…”云翊面无表情:“嗯。”慕三少顿了顿:“我不搞基…”云翊眉眼不动:“嗯。”慕三少:“…”慕三少咬牙:“云少主你是不是对我们慕家人有意见先前折腾我妹妹现在折腾我…”云翊看向她,似笑非笑。“你是女人,我便喜欢女人,你是男人,我便喜欢男人。如何?”慕三少颤抖的看着他:“…禽…禽兽!”云翊了然,郑重点头:“嗯,你若是禽兽,我也只喜欢你。”总之,只有你,就是你!战西野新书玄幻言情大作《神医嫡女:帝君,请下嫁!》惊喜来袭!重生归来,她虐渣打脸重登巅峰!碧落黄泉,他许她一场盛世豪宠!后街上的老房子
他们决定让丘比先进去。达伦?迪克解释道:第一,丘比是他们当中年龄最大、阅历最深的人,因此,理应他领头;第二,丘比又是团队的新人,此次正是证明他自己的机会;第三,达伦说,他本不同意丘比来,但他非要来。还有,丘比较胖,藏在房子里的罪犯,会在里面挖洞躲避警察,只有笨重、跑不快的人才能把罪犯引出来,等另两人看清后,跑去报告时才讲得清楚。达伦又说,奖励肯定会有,甚至是钱。“咱们怎么知道会不会有奖励?”丘比问。达伦说:“抓罪犯总是有奖励的。”“咱们怎么知道里面一定有罪犯?”