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那年晏琦七岁,不知怎的就入了传说中某位神秘莫测的国师的眼。多年后,出落的亭亭玉立的某女仰天抗议,“我要退婚……”某国师,“乖,老天都得听我的。”再某日,侍卫来禀:“主子不好了,晏小姐要把安太后的娘家安家给拆了!”“嗯,派人过去把安家围了,不许任何人伤到她一根头发……”“主子又不好了,晏小姐把未来的储君太子给揍了!”某国师边挽袖边往外走:“在哪?本座要亲自过去替她揍,免得她手疼……还有,你们去给皇帝老头松松骨头醒醒脑子,生而不教为父之过,看看这像什么话?”“主子大事不妙了,晏小姐要翻天了……她和老夫人都打起来了!”某国师当即一个激灵:“快去给本座取个榴莲来,老娘都遭殃了,儿子能躲得过?”Can I Sit on Your Lap While You're Pooping?
As a single dad, Matthew Carroll didn't always have someone to share in his frequent laughter and incredulity at the various things his daughter, Morgan, said. Hoping to docu?ment some of her best commentary, Carroll took to recording her choicest quotes on his iPhone when she was between the ages of three and five. He then compiled them chronologically in a small homemade volume for friends and family who, compelled by the hilarious and touching content, encouraged him to share it with a larger audience. Can I Sit on Your Lap While You're Pooping? is the record of the hilarious, crazy, and touching pronouncements of a little girl, but it's also the irresistible documentation of the love between a parent and child.