My face is wet with tears of relief and joy. I press it into his neck, my hands grasping at his rough shirt. I don't remember him feeling this strong. His smell is different, too—like forest and spice. And he's taller? No, his boots make him taller. I pull back to get a better look at him.
His hair has grown in—short and soft, like dark chick down. He's wearing those strange clothes from Genya's village—wide brown pants tucked into boots—and it's clear he's been working outside these past weeks. His skin is darker from the sun, and his shoulders are broader.
"What are you doing here?" I choke out.
My breath gets quick as he grasps the back of my neck with one strong hand. Runs his thumb over my cheek. And the sight of him, his dark eyes so perfect and familiar, weakens my knees. He came. He came for me.
All at once I remember how many people are around, and I glance at the sea of faces, a mite embarrassed. But I can't stop my gaze from going back to Kane.
"So glad you're safe, Em," he says, and hearing his smoke-and-honey voice again, hearing him say my name—it's like summer bursting into my heart.
I look to Matisa. She's smiling, but her brow is furrowed. Like she's waiting on the bad news.
Because there must be bad news. Why else would Kane show up this way?
Kane nods at the group of scouts, who are surrounded by various members of their families. "They found us about a day out," he says.
"Us?" I ask.
And I notice the figure on the other side of the horse. She ducks under its neck and offers me a shy smile. Cheeks pink as ever. Shiny dark hair framing her face …
"Genya," I say in shock. I look around for the others—for Kane's brothers—but it's just the scouts. And Genya and Kane. I don't understand.
"They brought important news," Matisa says. She gestures toward the warriors' quarter. I crane my neck and notice an even larger crowd gathering there. There's a flurry of activity at the weaponry. I catch a glimpse of Huritt, can see him barking orders. Warriors are gathering. Nishwa is among them.
"What's happening?" I'm still trying to make sense of Genya, here. With Kane. I frown in the direction of the assembling warriors.
"They will ride out to defend our valley," Matisa explains.
Fear stabs through my confusion. I look from her to Kane. His face is grave.
"Against who?" I ask.
"The Dominion," Matisa answers. "Let us talk at the healers' lodge." She puts out a hand to Kane and Genya. "You must be hungry and tired."
Kane nods. He grabs a pack from the ground at his feet and attempts to shoulder it but winces and drops it again.
"Careful!" Genya's face creases with concern as she hurries to his side, putting a hand on his arm.
"You are hurt?" Matisa asks. I can't get my tongue to work; I'm too busy watching Genya touch Kane.
"It's nothing," he says. But he doesn't move away from Genya. "A small cut from a tree branch."
"Em will see to it," Matisa says. She gestures, impatient. "Come."
In the common area of the lodge, I set to grinding yarrow for a healing paste while Matisa finds food and hot tea for Kane and Genya. We have stores of the paste, but I need something to do.
Kane and Genya sit near the hot stove, looking as though their excitement at arriving here has passed and exhaustion has taken its place. Kane slumps in his chair and accepts a plate from Matisa with a grateful half smile. I'm nervous and distracted, and my hands are clumsy. Kane appearing this way, out of the blue, felt like a miracle. Felt like the answer to the question that's been burning in my heart. When I saw him, I thought he came all this way for me. But …
Genya watches him close and picks at her food.
I focus on my hands until Matisa clears their plates and explains to me that Eisu spotted Kane and Genya while patrolling the swamp forest east of the lake. The third group of scouts was returning, and he alerted them, bringing them to Kane and Genya's aid.
Kane fiddles with his cup of hot tea and, at Matisa's gentle prompt, begins to explain. He tells us that Genya's village fell under attack from pale newcomers, likely Leon's men. Dominion soldiers arrived and fought off the attackers. He tells us the Dominion have occupied the village now and are using it as a kind of base.
"They've heard about the men carving out their own law out here; they've been ordered to crush any uprising," he explains.
"Uprising?" I repeat.
"Anyone who doesn't abide by Dominion law. Anyone who's settling out here without their say-so."
"Their quarrel is with Leon, then," I say.
Matisa refills Genya's tea, shaking her head. "If they are ruling over land they have never even seen, their quarrel is with us, too."
"That's why Genya and I needed to get here before they did," Kane says.
I frown. "But if they're concerned with the lawless, shouldn't they be looking for the Keep?"
"Leon isn't their only concern." Kane sets his mug down. "When they arrived at Genya's village, they sent men to inspect every home. They were looking for sick people. They'd lost several men on their journey."
"The Bleed?"
He nods. "I think they were trying to contain the sickness, like we used to when people took fever in the settlement," he says. "It's obvious they don't understand it—where it is, how people get sick."
"So …"
"They're occupying Genya's village because it appears to be safe. They're real interested in safe places."
I look at Matisa. Her face is grim. "Like this place," she states.
"Genya's people didn't mean any harm," Kane says. "But the Dominion asked if they knew of anyone else in the area surviving the sickness."
"And Genya's people knew of this place because of us," I realize, thinking back to our night at that strange village.
"At first we think Dominion will help." Genya's blue eyes are sincere. "But maybe not. And Kane say they are danger to you. We come to warn." She looks at Kane, and her cheeks go pink.
But why "we"? Why did he bring you? I silence the caustic voice in my head and grind the yarrow harder, thinking instead of the warriors of this village preparing and setting out. Ready to fight. "Can you be sure they'll come with force?" I ask. "Why are they so determined?"
"From what I could tell from their conversations, they believe that the land out here is valuable. There are"—Kane searches for the word—"resources here. They don't want more people like Leon arriving here first. But they're getting desperate, losing men to the Bleed. They were planning to head this way, once they'd regrouped. So once it was safe for us to try, we got out."
"Got out?" I take a pan of boiling water from the stove and set it beside the yarrow.
"They're worried about deserters. No one's allowed in or out of the village."
"But then how—"
"There was a way out near the spring. Genya showed me."
I look at Genya. Her cheeks are pinker still.
"You helped him escape to come here?" I ask.
"And then I come with. To be sure."
Kane nods. He's looking on her with admiration.
"But D-D-Daniel? And Nico?" Stop stammering.
"My brothers are safe there, for now," Kane says. "They've taken to Genya's ma, Dorotea."
I should be grateful to Genya for helping Kane, but jealousy is stabbing through me, hot and unfamiliar. I wonder just how entwined Kane and his brothers are with Genya's family now. I turn away, busying my hands with a cloth. "Take your shirt off," I say over my shoulder to Kane.
"Thank you for this," Matisa says to Genya and Kane. "It is good that you came. Good that you warned us. Now our warriors can meet the Dominion before they enter our valley, and Huritt will decide what show of force is best." I know what she's not saying; without the remedy to bargain with, force is all our warriors have.
"When do they ride out?" I ask.
"They have already sent more scouts. Huritt will lead close to a hundred warriors to the valley's mouth the day after tomorrow."
"Will a hundred be enough?"
"Kane tells us there were no more than a hundred Dominion."
But I can hear the worry in her voice. I dip a cloth into the pan of cooling water and turn to Kane, who is half undressed. There's a cut on his shoulder and a bruise the size of my thumb blossoming under the tip of his collarbone. I'm full aware of Genya as I wring out the cloth in the pan and approach him.
When I press the cloth to his wound, he sucks in a quick breath, closing his eyes. "Sorry," I say. Why am I pressing so hard? I nod at the cut. "How did it happen?"
"It was foolish," he says. "That bog in the woods east of here. I tripped over some deadfall."
"You tripped?"
"I think he was not being careful," Genya says, looking on Kane with a fond smile.
"At least I didn't hide in a log when the scouts came."
Genya utters a sound of protest. "Big men on big horses! What should I think?"
"You were a trapped hare." Kane frowns, though it's clear he's teasing. "If they'd meant to harm us, you'd have packaged yourself for them real neat in that hollow fallen oak."
She narrows her eyes, but there is a smile on her face. She says a word I don't understand. It's clear Kane does. His smile goes wider, his mouth pulling up at one corner in that way of his. My stomach hollows out.
I set to my task, wiping aside the crusted blood as gentle as I can. I'm trying hard to keep my hands steady, but I'm staring at his skin—the skin my fingertips have touched so light, and then so desperate … my gaze traces the bruise along his collarbone to the curve of his chest … I turn away, back to the stove, and busy my hands scraping the yarrow together with the water, mixing it.
Matisa looks over my shoulder at the paste. "Good," she says.
"Course it's good," I mutter.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Genya venture close to peer at Kane's wound.
I clear my throat and ask her, "What's the plan for returning to your village?"
She looks at Kane.
"It's not going to be safe to do that for some time," he says. "And they'll need help."
"Help?"
"Getting their village back," Kane says. "From what I've seen of the Dominion …" A shadow crosses his face. "Like Leon, they take what they want." His gaze flicks to Genya. My heart stutters.
Oh. I bite back the sound just in time.
"Matisa," he says, "do you think your people …"
"We will help you," Matisa says.
"We'd be grateful," he replies. And hearing that "we"—knowing I'm not included in that …
I force myself to step close to him again. I take some of the ointment on two fingers and pat the salve onto Kane's wound as gentle as I can. My hand shakes.
"Genya's village took us in after the drylands," Matisa says. "And you have helped so much, bringing this news."
"Kane is the best kind of man," Genya says. "He will always help where is need."
The best kind of man.
When did Kane become a man?
I speak to fill the gaping hole in my heart. "I'm sure it wasn't easy to leave your family. I'm sure you miss them already."
She raises her chin. "I love my family," she says. "But they do not decide my life."
I feel a bit sick at her words, but looking at her face, flushed with hope, reminds me of the old me. She reminds me of that fierce girl setting out from the settlement, determined to carve a new path but hanging her hopes on the promise of someone choosing to walk that path with her.
When I left Kane at her village, it was because he couldn't go dragging his brothers out, chasing after me. For a heartbeat, I thought he'd made a different choice. He didn't. There's an angry throb in my chest, dark and ugly. I'm not thinking straight.
"I will speak to the circle," Matisa promises.
"Thank you." Genya smiles.
My heart's all upside down.
Focus on what matters.
What matters is that war is here.
"Genya may stay here, in the healers' lodge, for the night," Matisa says. "Kane, I will take you to my family."
Matisa returns from her family's lodge. She raises her eyebrows at me lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling. "You did not wish to walk with us?"
I don't answer. I made an excuse about a task I didn't have and left the common area soon as I bandaged Kane's wound. The wound he got because he "wasn't being careful."
I change the subject. "So, Huritt rides out soon."
"Yes."
"You're worried."
"Yes." She sits on the edge of her bed. "I will go to speak with the circle, but there is not much we can do. With nothing to negotiate with, I cannot help but think it will end in violence."
I lie silent, a niggle of despair eating at my insides.
"He came for you," Matisa says, out of nowhere. "That is one good thing."
Kane, of course.
I frown. "He came to warn your people."
"He could have sent word with the scouts and returned to Genya's village."
"He needed to ask for your help," I say. "Could hardly send that request with the scouts."
"You are not happy that he is here?"
"He brought Genya with him."
"She helped him," Matisa says. "And she wanted to come."
"Or he wanted her to come."
Matisa gives me a long look.
I flush. "It's …" I struggle to explain. "It's just—why else would he bring her all this way?" That look, when he talked about the Dominion taking what they want. "He could've told her no. Could've—"
"So ask him."
"Beg pardon?"
"Ask him why he came."
I stare at her. She says it like it's such a simple thing.
"Can't do that."
She studies me. "Do you feel the same for him as you once did?" Her eyes pierce into me, as though she's searching for the truth deep down in my heart.
I lie quiet a long while, staring at the ceiling and blinking back tears. I take a deep breath and meet her gaze. "No," I say, full truthful. "I love him more than before. So much, I'm not sure I can survive his answer." My breath hitches, and I turn my face away.
Matisa sits in silence for several moments.
"Do not let fear cloud your thoughts." Her voice is no longer mild. "The answer will be what it will be. But you need to ask."
