what says the almanac to that? POINS And look, whether the fiery Trigon, his man, be not lisping to his master's old tables, his note-book, his counsel-keeper. FALSTAFF Thou dost give me flattering busses. DOLL TEARSHEET By my troth, I kiss thee with a most constant heart. FALSTAFF I am old, I am old. DOLL TEARSHEET I love thee better than I love e'er a scurvy young boy of them all. FALSTAFF What stuff wilt have a kirtle of? I shall receive money o' Thursday: shalt have a cap to-morrow.
Amerry song, come: it grows late; we'll to bed.
Thou'lt forget me when I am gone. DOLL TEARSHEET By my troth, thou'lt set me a-weeping, an thou sayest so: prove that ever I dress myself handsome till thy return: well, harken at the end. FALSTAFF Some sack, Francis. PRINCE HENRY POINS Anon, anon, sir.
Coming forward FALSTAFF Ha! a bastard son of the king's? And art not thou Poins his brother? PRINCE HENRY Why, thou globe of sinful continents!
what a life dost thou lead! FALSTAFF A better than thou: I am a gentleman;thou art a drawer. PRINCE HENRY Very true, sir; and I come to draw you out by the ears. MISTRESS QUICKLY O, the Lord preserve thy good grace!
by my troth, welcome to London. Now, the Lord bless that sweet face of thine! O, Jesu, are you come from Wales? FALSTAFF Thou whoreson mad compound of majesty, by this light flesh and corrupt blood, thou art welcome. DOLL TEARSHEET How, you fat fool! I scorn you. POINS My lord, he will drive you out of your revenge and turn all to a merriment, if you take not the heat. PRINCE HENRY You whoreson candle-mine, you, how vilely did you speak of me even now before this honest, virtuous, civil gentlewoman! MISTRESS QUICKLY God's blessing of your good heart! and so she is, by my troth. FALSTAFF Didst thou hear me? PRINCE HENRY Yea, and you knew me, as you did when you ran away by Gad's-hill: you knew I was at your back, and spoke it on purpose to try my patience. FALSTAFF No, no, no; not so; I did not think thou wast within hearing. PRINCE HENRY I shall drive you then to confess the wilful abuse;and then I know how to handle you. FALSTAFF No abuse, Hal, o' mine honour, no abuse. PRINCE HENRY Not to dispraise me, and call me pantier and bread-chipper and I know not what? FALSTAFF No abuse, Hal. POINS No abuse? FALSTAFF No abuse, Ned, i' the world; honest Ned, none. Idispraised him before the wicked, that the wicked might not fall in love with him; in which doing, Ihave done the part of a careful friend and a true subject, and thy father is to give me thanks for it.
No abuse, Hal: none, Ned, none: no, faith, boys, none. PRINCE HENRY See now, whether pure fear and entire cowardice doth not make thee wrong this virtuous gentlewoman to close with us? is she of the wicked? is thine hostess here of the wicked? or is thy boy of the wicked? or honest Bardolph, whose zeal burns in his nose, of the wicked? POINS Answer, thou dead elm, answer. FALSTAFF The fiend hath pricked down Bardolph irrecoverable;and his face is Lucifer's privy-kitchen, where he doth nothing but roast malt-worms. For the boy, there is a good angel about him; but the devil outbids him too. PRINCE HENRY For the women? FALSTAFF For one of them, she is in hell already, and burns poor souls. For the other, I owe her money, and whether she be damned for that, I know not. MISTRESS QUICKLY No, I warrant you. FALSTAFF No, I think thou art not; I think thou art quit for that. Marry, there is another indictment upon thee, for suffering flesh to be eaten in thy house, contrary to the law; for the which I think thou wilt howl. MISTRESS QUICKLY All victuallers do so; what's a joint of mutton or two in a whole Lent? PRINCE HENRY You, gentlewoman,- DOLL TEARSHEET What says your grace? FALSTAFF His grace says that which his flesh rebels against.
Knocking within MISTRESS QUICKLY Who knocks so loud at door? Look to the door there, Francis.
Enter PETO PRINCE HENRY Peto, how now! what news? PETO The king your father is at Westminster:
And there are twenty weak and wearied posts Come from the north: and, as I came along, I met and overtook a dozen captains, Bare-headed, sweating, knocking at the taverns, And asking every one for Sir John Falstaff. PRINCE HENRY By heaven, Poins, I feel me much to blame, So idly to profane the precious time, When tempest of commotion, like the south Borne with black vapour, doth begin to melt And drop upon our bare unarmed heads.
Give me my sword and cloak. Falstaff, good night.
Exeunt PRINCE HENRY, POINS, PETO and BARDOLPH FALSTAFF Now comes in the sweetest morsel of the night, and we must hence and leave it unpicked.
Knocking within More knocking at the door!
Re-enter BARDOLPH
How now! what's the matter? BARDOLPH You must away to court, sir, presently;A dozen captains stay at door for you. FALSTAFF [To the Page] Pay the musicians, sirrah.
Farewell, hostess; farewell, Doll. You see, my good wenches, how men of merit are sought after: the undeserver may sleep, when the man of action is called on.
Farewell good wenches: if I be not sent away post, I will see you again ere I go. DOLL TEARSHEET I cannot speak; if my heart be not read to burst,--well, sweet Jack, have a care of thyself. FALSTAFF Farewell, farewell.
Exeunt FALSTAFF and BARDOLPH MISTRESS QUICKLY Well, fare thee well: I have known thee these twenty-nine years, come peascod-time; but an honester and truer-hearted man,--well, fare thee well. BARDOLPH [Within] Mistress Tearsheet! MISTRESS QUICKLY What's the matter? BARDOLPH [Within] Good Mistress Tearsheet, come to my master. MISTRESS QUICKLY O, run, Doll, run; run, good Doll: come.
She comes blubbered Yea, will you come, Doll?
