AS WE all went up it occurred to me that there ought to be a man at the helm.I raised my voice not much above a whisper, and, noiselessly, an un-complaining spirit in a fever-wasted body appeared in the light aft, the head with hollow eyes illumi-nated against the blackness which had swallowed up our world--and the universe.The bared fore-arm extended over the upper spokes seemed to shine with a light of its own.
I murmured to that luminous appearance:
"Keep the helm right amidships."
It answered in a tone of patient suffering:
"Right amidships, sir."
Then I descended to the quarter-deck.It was impossible to tell whence the blow would come.To look round the ship was to look into a bottomless, black pit.The eye lost itself in inconceivable depths.
I wanted to ascertain whether the ropes had been picked up off the deck.One could only do that by feeling with one's feet.In my cautious progress Icame against a man in whom I recognized Ransome.He possessed an unimpaired physical solidity which was manifest to me at the contact.
He was leaning against the quarter-deck capstan and kept silent.It was like a revelation.He was the collapsed figure sobbing for breath I had no-ticed before we went on the poop.
"You have been helping with the mainsail!" Iexclaimed in a low tone.
"Yes, sir," sounded his quiet voice.
"Man! What were you thinking of? You mustn't do that sort of thing."After a pause he assented: "I suppose I
mustn't." Then after another short silence he added: "I am all right now," quickly, between the tell-tale gasps.
I could neither hear nor see anybody else; but when I spoke up, answering sad murmurs filled the quarter-deck, and its shadows seemed to shift here and there.I ordered all the halyards laid down on deck clear for running.
"I'll see to that, sir," volunteered Ransome in his natural, pleasant tone, which comforted one and aroused one's compassion, too, somehow.
That man ought to have been in his bed, resting, and my plain duty was to send him there.But perhaps he would not have obeyed me; I had not the strength of mind to try.All I said was:
"Go about it quietly, Ransome."
Returning on the poop I approached Gambril.
His face, set with hollow shadows in the light, looked awful, finally silenced.I asked him how he felt, but hardly expected an answer.There-fore, I was astonished at his comparative loquac-ity.
"Them shakes leaves me as weak as a kitten, sir," he said, preserving finely that air of uncon-sciousness as to anything but his business a helms-man should never lose."And before I can pick up my strength that there hot fit comes along and knocks me over again."He sighed.There was no reproach in his tone, but the bare words were enough to give me a hor-rible pang of self-reproach.It held me dumb for a time.When the tormenting sensation had passed off I asked:
"Do you feel strong enough to prevent the rud-der taking charge if she gets sternway on her? It wouldn't do to get something smashed about the steering-gear now.We've enough difficulties to cope with as it is."He answered with just a shade of weariness that he was strong enough to hang on.He could promise me that she shouldn't take the wheel out of his hands.More he couldn't say.
At that moment Ransome appeared quite close to me, stepping out of the darkness into visibility suddenly, as if just created with his composed face and pleasant voice.
Every rope on deck, he said, was laid down clear for running, as far as one could make certain by feeling.It was impossible to see anything.
Frenchy had stationed himself forward.He said he had a jump or two left in him yet.
Here a faint smile altered for an instant the clear, firm design of Ransome's lips.With his serious clear, gray eyes, his serene temperament--he was a priceless man altogether.Soul as firm as the muscles of his body.
He was the only man on board (except me, but Ihad to preserve my liberty of movement) who had a sufficiency of muscular strength to trust to.For a moment I thought I had better ask him to take the wheel.But the dreadful knowledge of the enemy he had to carry about him made me hesi-tate.In my ignorance of physiology it occurred to me that he might die suddenly, from excitement, at a critical moment.
While this gruesome fear restrained the ready words on the tip of my tongue, Ransome stepped back two paces and vanished from my sight.
At once an uneasiness possessed me, as if some support had been withdrawn.I moved forward, too, outside the circle of light, into the darkness that stood in front of me like a wall.In one stride I penetrated it.Such must have been the dark-ness before creation.It had closed behind me.Iknew I was invisible to the man at the helm.
Neither could I see anything.He was alone, I was alone, every man was alone where he stood.And every form was gone, too, spar, sail, fittings, rails;everything was blotted out in the dreadful smooth-ness of that absolute night.
A flash of lightning would have been a relief--Imean physically.I would have prayed for it if it hadn't been for my shrinking apprehension of the thunder.In the tension of silence I was suffering from it seemed to me that the first crash must turn me into dust.
And thunder was, most likely, what would hap-pen next.Stiff all over and hardly breathing, I waited with a horribly strained expectation.
Nothing happened.It was maddening, but a dull, growing ache in the lower part of my face made me aware that I had been grinding my teeth madly enough, for God knows how long.
It's extraordinary I should not have heard my-self doing it; but I hadn't.By an effort which absorbed all my faculties I managed to keep my jaw still.It required much attention, and while thus engaged I became bothered by curious, ir-regular sounds of faint tapping on the deck.They could be heard single, in pairs, in groups.While I wondered at this mysterious devilry, I received a slight blow under the left eye and felt an enor-mous tear run down my cheek.Raindrops.
Enormous.Forerunners of something.
Tap.Tap.Tap....
