登陆注册
5212300000033

第33章

"Ah, an abridged edition, no doubt," said the Prophet."Still--""I am better now," interposed Madame Sagittarius, brushing some crumbs of toast from her pelisse with the orange handkerchief."Jupiter, if you are ready, we can explain the test to the gentleman."So saying she drew a vinaigrette, set with fine imitation carbuncles, from the plush reticule, and applied it majestically to her nose.The Prophet grew really perturbed.He remembered his promise to his grandmother and Sir Tiglath, and felt that he must assert himself more strongly.

"I assure you," he began, with some show of firmness, "no tests will be necessary.My telescope has already been removed from its position, and--""Then it must be reinstated, sir," said Mr.Sagittarius, "and this very night.Madame has hit upon a plan, sir, of searching you to the quick.

Trust a woman, sir, to do that."

"I should naturally trust Madame Sagittarius," said the Prophet, very politely."But I really cannot--""So you say, sir.Our business is to find out whether, living in the Berkeley Square as you do, you can bring off a prophecy of any importance or not.The future of myself, Madame and family depends upon the results of the experiments which we shall make upon you during the next few days."The Prophet began to feel as if he were shut up alone with a couple of determined practitioners of vivisection.

"Let's see, my dear," continued Mr.Sagittarius, addressing his wife, "what was it to be?""The honored grandmother one," replied the lady, tersely.

The Prophet started.

"I cannot possibly consent--" he began.

"Pray, Mr.Vivian, listen to me," interposed Madame Sagittarius.

"Pray, sir, attend to Madame!" said Mr.Sagittarius, sternly.

"But I must really--"

"January," said Madame, "is a month of grave importance to grandmothers this year, is it not, Jupiter?""Yes, my dear.In consequence of Scorpio being in the sign of Sagittarius.The crab will be very busy up till the third of February.""Just so."

"At which date the little dog, my love, assumes the roll of maleficence towards the aged.""I know./Cane cavem/.When was the old lady born, Mr.Vivian, if you please?""What old lady?" stammered the Prophet, beginning to perspire.

"The old lady who's got ankles, your honoured grandmother?""On the twentieth of this month.But--"

"At what time?"

"Six in the morning.But--"

"Under what star?"

"Saturn.But--"

"That's lucky, isn't it, Jupiter?" said Madame, in an increasingly business-like manner."That brings her into touch with the Camelopard--doesn't it?"

"Into very close touch indeed, my dear, and also with the bull.He goes right to her, as you may say.""I cannot conceivably permit--" began the Prophet in much agitation.

But Madame, without taking the smallest notice of him, proceeded.

"Will the scorpion be round her on her birthday?""Close round her, my love--with the serpent.They work together.""Together, do they? You know what effect they'll have on her, don't you, Jupiter?""I should rather think so, my darling," replied Mr.Sagittarius, with an air of profound and sinister information.

The Prophet's blood ran cold in his veins.Yet he felt for the moment unable to utter a syllable, or even to make a gesture of protest.So entirely detached from him did the worthy couple appear to be, so completely wrapped up in their own evidently well-considered and carefully-laid plans, that he had a sense of being in another sphere, not theirs, of hearing their remarks from some distance off.Madame Sagittarius now turned towards him in a formal manner, and continued.

"And now, Mr.Vivian, I shall have to lay down the procedure that you will follow.Have you a good memory--no, a pencil and notebook will be best./Litterae scriptus manetur/, as we all know full well.Have you a pencil and--?"The Prophet nodded mechanically.

"Will you kindly get them?"

The Prophet rose, walked to his writing table and felt for the implements.

"If you will sit down now I will direct you," continued Madame, authoritatively.

The Prophet sat down at the table, holding a lead pencil upside down in one hand and an account-book wrong side up in the other.

"Let's see--what's to-day?" inquired Madame, of her husband.

"The seventeenth, my dear," replied Mr.Sagittarius, looking at his wife with almost sickly adoration.

"To be sure.Capricornus's day for Homer's Idyl.Very well, Mr.Vivian, to-day being the seventeenth, and the old lady's birthday the twentieth, you have three days, or rather nights, of steady work before you.""Steady work?" murmured the Prophet.

"What should be his hours, Jupiter?" continued Madame."At what time of night is he to commence? Shall I say nine?"The Prophet remembered feebly that, during the next three nights, he had two important dinner-engagements, a party at the Russian Ambassador's, and a reception at the Lord Chancellor's just opposite.

However, he made no remark.Somehow he felt that words were useless when confronted with such an iron will as that of the lady in the pelisse.

"Nine would be too early, my dear," said Mr.Sagittarius."Eleven p.m.

would be more to the purpose."

"Eleven let it be then, punctually.Will you dot down, Mr.Vivian, that you have to be at the telescope to take observations at eleven p.m.

every night from now till the twentieth.""But I have had the telesc--"

"Kindly dot it down."

The Prophet dotted it down with the wrong end of the pencil on the wrong side of the account-book.

"And what are his hours to be exactly, Jupiter?" continued Madame.

"From eleven till dawn, I suppose?"

The Prophet shuddered.

同类推荐
  • 童蒙诗训

    童蒙诗训

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 大方等陀罗尼经

    大方等陀罗尼经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 太上洞玄灵宝消禳火灾经

    太上洞玄灵宝消禳火灾经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 上清大洞三景玉清隐书诀箓

    上清大洞三景玉清隐书诀箓

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 咏史

    咏史

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 与恶魔交换

    与恶魔交换

    那一年,他选择了当一个恶魔。那一年,是十六岁,他无法相信家里从此少了一个人,却多了两个人。爸爸的那一句话是那么刻骨铭心,看着她那副长得楚楚可怜的脸孔,心里头的恨油然而生。她是那个女人带来的。也就是那个女人破坏了他原本美好的家庭。从此,妈妈不再回来,已经被赶离到加拿大。就这样,少了妈妈,却多了个继母和那女人的女儿。要与这个女人的女儿兄妹相称?不可能,办得到的就是圣人了。他偏偏不是圣人,也不想当圣人。因此,他决定当一个恶魔。有她没我,这是他挂在嘴边多年的原则。多年后,是二十一岁那一年。她楚楚可怜的模样问道,“多年了,究竟要怎样,彼此才能好好相处下来?”她也实在受够了他这恶魔的脾气,彼此同一屋檐下,只希望可以好好相处。他看着她,结果给她说了一个办不到的条件,“除非你是我的女人了!”啊..他的女人!爱恨之间,只不过一线之差。爱的时候,犹如淡淡的蓝色天空那样柔和;恨的时候,犹如暴雨前夕的乌云那么不能平静;虐的时候,犹如风雨交加的雨夜那么可怕
  • 快穿逆袭之男主到我碗里来

    快穿逆袭之男主到我碗里来

    凤沁儿:“男主到我碗里来!”主神:“做我的女人!”凤沁儿:“我并不想做你的女人。”主神:“不!你想!”凤沁儿只想好好完成任务然后获得重生,并没有想过要跟主神谈恋爱,也不明白为什么他会突然缠着自己不放。系统:“你就跟主神爸爸走吧!”凤沁儿:“滚!我是不会去给你当后妈!”系统只想让主神爸爸找到心爱的人,却并没有想过那个人会是自己的宿主。凤沁儿:“你们是不是串通好的?”系统and主神:“不是!”凤沁儿:“我信你个鬼!糟老头子坏的很!”【群号码:835754341欢迎各位小可爱的加入!】
  • 小相公追妻记

    小相公追妻记

    他和她,青梅竹马。小时候的他,总是受她保护。情窦初开,他去追大家闺秀,她搞破坏,顺便史无前例的纠缠他。后来,迫于压力,她远嫁南方,他才发现,没有她的生活,陷入了混乱。于是,他认真学习做生意,考虑举家迁往南方。再相遇,他已进化成狼,势必要扑到她这个小白兔!
  • 星星之家

    星星之家

    从天而降,他来到的是异乡,还是本来就是他该生存的地方。在这里,他有了想要捍卫的家,有了想守护的人,可危机似乎并没有因为他的远遁而消失,后面又会发生什么。他又将在这个星球释放什么样的力量,又会以什么样的姿态回归家乡。
  • 吴礼部诗话

    吴礼部诗话

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 平世记

    平世记

    生活在平世中,每个人都有自己信仰!没有真正错与对?
  • 雄辩艺术

    雄辩艺术

    孔夫子也有句千古不坏的名言:“慎于言而敏于行。”这是说话、做事的诀窍。言在前,行在后,可见“言”的重要性和首要性,在中国,首先要会说话,尤其在今天的社会。本书截取的是历代思想家通过雄辩化解危机,实现自己人生抱负的小故事,结合现实生活中的需要而阐述的说话的技巧和艺术。
  • 黄昏岸边说声有

    黄昏岸边说声有

    我的故事或许怨了丰收。不是夏粮作物的丰收,是秋季作物的丰收。舅的那个地方因为气候、地理的原因,是一年一熟的单季种植杂粮区。说是叫因地制宜呢,杂粮也不再杂,高粱、大豆、谷子、红薯、山药蛋,包括南瓜、东瓜都不种了,人们齐刷刷种下了玉茭子。这几年是玉茭子的丰收。收玉茭子看起来省事其实不省事,不像小麦收下了就有粮商直接买走,得割倒了再掰,掰下的玉茭棒子肩挑车拉运回家,先用各种荆条编织的囤子囤起来,囤在院子里。不大的院落就全让玉茭囤子占据着,矗眼前的不仅是黑乎乎的玉茭囤子,往小里说,是一年油盐酱醋的代名词;往大里说,婚丧嫁娶起房建屋也指望着它呢。
  • 鄂西天空

    鄂西天空

    她真的很漂亮,第一次见到她的时候我的意识就被她电击了,有那么片刻完全短路,空白一片,不知道站在哪里,也不知道自己是谁。好在这个时候我抬头仰望了一下天空,才把我拽回到现实的地面。因为就是那样抬头一望,我发现鄂西湛蓝的天空正在目不转睛地望着我,我这才清醒过来,发现我不过就是鄂西山村的一个小青年,叫吴思,她的漂亮与我无关。不过她确实很漂亮,我真的被她的漂亮震呆了。我们这个世界尽管多数事物呈现的是混乱的表象,让我们看不清楚真相,但就是有那么一些极少的事物能够把它的本质外显出来,让我们的眼睛能捕捉到,我们在那一刻就会被那种美深深地震撼,忘掉自己。
  • 佛说谤佛经

    佛说谤佛经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。