登陆注册
5297800000159

第159章 From Deep Experience.(1)

With the night dreams began to vanish and the prose of reality gradually to take form and outline in Van Berg's mind.He was compelled to admit that the plausible theories by which he had hitherto satisfied himself scarcely accounted for his moods and sensations the past few days,and memory quietly informed him that it had never had any consciousness of such a friendship as he now was forming.But like many another man in the process of conviction against his will,he became irritable and angrily blind to a truth that would place him in an intolerable dilemma.He went to his studio,and worded with dogged obstinacy on the picture designed for Ida,giving his time to those details which required only artistic skill,for his perturbed mind was in no mood for any nice creative work.

He had agreed to meet Ida and her father on the afternoon boat;and his impatience,and the early hour he started to keep the appointment,was another straw which he was compelled to see in spite of himself;nor could he fail to note which way the current was bearing him.

"Well,"he muttered,with the fatuity common in all strong temptations,"I'll spend a few more hours with this rare Undine,this genuine woman,who--infinitely more beautiful than Venus--is rising out of the dark waters of sorrow,shame,and despair,and then if I find that it will be wiser and safer to be only a somewhat unobtrusive and distant friend,showing my good-will more by deeds than by seeking her society,I can gradually take this course without wounding her feelings or exciting suspicion of the cause.She was right,although she little imagines the reason;we could never have those readings together,and I fear I must manage with far fewer visits to my studio than I had hoped for.What an accursed chaotic old world it is anyway!How grateful she is because I merely treat her father politely!It would be impossible to do anything else,now that he is himself again,and yet,by this simple,easy method,I have won a friendlier regard than I could by any other means.

Like an idiot,I once thought she would have to withdraw from her father to develop her new and beautiful life.If even in faintest suggestion I had revealed that thought to her,I don't believe she would have spoken to me again;and I foresee that I shall have to be exceedingly polite to Mrs.Mayhew also,for my Undine is developing a conscience that might become a man's implacable enemy.

But what am I thinking about!If I do not intend to see much of the daughter,I shall not waste any time on the mother.I wonder if Miss Mayhew meant anything by that odd little ballad last evening.

Could she have intended to remind me of blue-eyed Jennie Burton?

No,for she was singing it by herself,when she did not know I was listening.The idiotic brook!If I had given my whole heart to the effort I might have won Jennie Burton by this time.Ida Mayhew was right;no woman that I wish to win will show a lover any favor till he cannot help stopping and staying,too."A moment later he stopped short in the street."Great God!"muttered he,"do I wish to win Jennie Burton?Whither am I drifting?Would to heaven I had not made this appointment this afternoon.Well,I'm in for it now,"and he strode along as if he were going to battle,resolving to be guarded to the last degree,lest Ida should suspect his weakness.

He saw her come on the boat with her father at the last moment,her cheeks flushed with the heat and her eyes aglow with the hurry and excitement of the occasion.He saw one and another of her young gentlemen acquaintances step eagerly forward to speak to her and admiring eyes turning towards her on every side."She won't lack for friends and companions now,and I soon will be little missed,"he thought bitterly.One gentleman,in his impatience for her society,sought to obtain her small travelling-bag,ad was assuring her that he could obtain seats for herself and father on the crowded boat,when,by her timid glance around,she showed that she was expecting some one,and Van Berg hastened forward and said quietly,"I have seats reserved in the pilot-house."She gave him a glad smile of welcome;but almost instantly her face became grave and questioning in its expression;and she looked at him keenly as he cordially shook hands with her father.As they went away with him,as if by a prearrangement several guests of the Lake House looked at each other and nodded their heads significantly.

While on the way to the pilot-house,and during their conversation after arriving there,Ida often turned a quick,questioning glance towards Van Berg,and her expression reminded him of some children's faces he had seen as they tried to read the thoughts or intentions of those who had their interests in keeping.He tried his best to be cordial and natural in manner--to be,in brief,the sincere friend that he had professed himself--and Mr.Mayhew did not notice anything amiss;but even at some inflection of his voice,or at a pause in the conversation,Ida would turn towards him this sudden,questioning,child-like look,which touched him deeply while it puzzled him.But she gradually began to grow "distrait"and quiet,and to look less and less often.Van Berg had a deep affection for the noble river on which they were sailing,and had familiarized himself with its history and legends.By means of these he sought to entertain Ida and her father,and with the latter he succeeded abundantly;but he often doubted whether Ida heard him,for her eyes and thoughts seemed to be wandering beyond the blue Highlands which they now were entering.At last Mr.Mayhew left them for a while,and Van Berg turned and said gently:

"Miss Ida,you are not in good spirits this afternoon."She did not answer for a moment,but averted her face still further from him.At last she said,in a low tone:"Mr.Van Berg,did you ever have a presentiment of evil?""I don't believe in such things,"he replied promptly.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 汽车驾驶速成与禁忌

    汽车驾驶速成与禁忌

    《汽车驾驶速成与禁忌(新装畅销版)》是在全面透彻研究新《机动车驾驶证申领和使用规定》的基础上,针对汽车驾驶操作技能和驾驶证考试实际需要,以全新的思路、科学的理念,向广大爱车族全面介绍了汽车驾驶基础动作的练习方法和有关道路交通管理常识;并以丰富的汽车驾驶教学经验,重点阐述了汽车驾驶的操作技巧,从而使初学者能迅速掌握汽车驾驶技术,达到事半功倍的效果。在编写过程中,尽量以图解形式,力求通俗易懂、便于理解和掌握。《汽车驾驶速成与禁忌(新装畅销版)》适用于准备学车、正在学车或新驾驶员自学,并可以作为汽车驾驶学校的教材,是爱车族学习开车的良师,是独立驾驶、保证安全的助手,是提高技能、步人高手的阶梯。
  • 古镜奇仙

    古镜奇仙

    平凡少年秦一阳偶得神秘古镜,可变废为宝,化腐朽为神奇。自此鱼跃龙门,步步升仙。踏仙门,快意道途;问苍穹,谁主沉浮!笑傲三界,叱咤九天,问鼎大道,逍遥长生。
  • 空间农女种田记

    空间农女种田记

    新书已发布《这个大佬不能惹》,书荒可移驾到此,谢谢惠顾。【宠文】某日,林枼儿一觉醒来发现身边多了一美男子,惊得她直接将人拍飞出去。“你是谁。”林枼儿警惕的看着那长如妖孽般的男人。“你是我娘子。”林枼儿无语的扶额。原以为是个无害的小白兔,没想到他的真面目是这样的。
  • 洞见·无常与新生

    洞见·无常与新生

    幸福人生不是一个泛泛而谈的概念,而是每个人都能够落实的具体做法。这种做法不是通过听讲习得的,却可以通过打开心量,专注当下,本书可以改变自己的思维方式,用更高远的视野去理解人生这些具体的实践来达成。如果愿意在生活中试一试,便会得到不可思议的改变。
  • 火力战车实录

    火力战车实录

    人类的历史可以说就是一部人类的战争史。战争是那般的残酷,可对胜利的憧憬使它同时又极大地刺激着人类的智慧,推动着科技的飞速发展,各种威力更强大的武器也便应“运”而生,坦克、装甲战车、自行火炮便是其中的佼佼者。它们厚重而庞大的身形、撼天动地的巨大威力令它们在无数军事爱好者的心目中魅力无穷。
  • 星空剑神传说

    星空剑神传说

    一代丹武双修的丹灵剑尊林寒为了超越至尊,前往域外而陨落。但他却是带着天道秘宝重生在一个同名少年的身上,而这少年的身份却不得了……从此星空风起云涌,与当代天骄一决雌雄!天地玄黄;宇宙洪荒。日月盈昃;辰宿列张。剑号紫星;灵称天灵。
  • 会跑的布娃娃(原创经典作品)

    会跑的布娃娃(原创经典作品)

    善读精品美文,拾取久违的感动;体悟百味人生,感受成长的快乐。阅读其间,时而在惊险悬疑的案件中悚然而惊,时而为体察入微的真情潸然泪下,时而又涌动着想针砭时弊的激情……掩卷而思,人性的美丑,世事的善恶,人生际遇的变幻无常不禁让人感慨万千。
  • 蓝茧

    蓝茧

    来自中国的夏瑞漫在英国读了两年高中后迈进了大学校园。她根据自己的兴趣,选择历史作为专业。从学习到生活,大学对于夏瑞漫来说充满了不适应和挑战 - 看规定书籍因为一句都不明白的挫败感,自觉无人可以依靠而心升的无助等等。但渐渐的,她喜欢上了她的大学Woodlands School 和伦敦这座城市。通过不同的方式,夏瑞漫结识到世界各国的朋友,主要以中国人和英国人为主。他们每个人都有自己的性格特点、做事方式和思维想法。在学校里,夏瑞漫先是为学校报刊报导新闻,后来成功竞选成为新闻主编。她两次的爱情经历有甜蜜和美好更有苦涩和悲痛,给她的是截然不同的体验。
  • 妈咪爹地回来了

    妈咪爹地回来了

    ☆晓月晨曦★我的新文已完结,欢迎围观!【已完结,霸道首席,萌宝酷妈,有虐有宠有灵异,欢迎跳坑。】孤女带着拖油瓶住进某市的豪门世家,丈夫不爱,婆婆嫌弃,小姑子记恨。他说:“林惜,我不管你是用了什么手段、采用什么方式怀上并生下了我的孩子,但你不要妄想母凭子贵,因为,在我眼里,你只不过是一个不择手段的贱‘人而已!”当她被他伤透了心,选择离开时,他挽留,并且对她百般疼爱。这是什么意思,她在时,他恶语相向,她离开时,他百般挽留?
  • 凉少,你老婆又跑了

    凉少,你老婆又跑了

    五年前,他亲手把她送进监狱五年后,他在她的婚礼上毁了她的清白误会解除,某男化身宠妻狂魔凉先生。七夕这么好的日子,我们庆祝一下呗,怎么庆祝?比如,我们先离个婚。--情节虚构,请勿模仿