登陆注册
5419900000016

第16章

With many a winsome smile I'd witch and woo;With gay and girlish guile I'd frenzy you--I'd madden you with my caressing, Like turtle, her first love confessing--That it was "mock", no mortal would be guessing, With so much winsome wile I'd witch and woo!

Did any other maid With you succeed, I'd pinch the forward jade--I would indeed!

With jealous frenzy agitated (Which would, of course, be simulated), I'd make her wish she'd never been created--Did any other maid With you succeed!

And should there come to me, Some summers hence, In all the childish glee Of innocence, Fair babes, aglow with beauty vernal, My heart would bound with joy diurnal!

This sweet display of sympathy maternal, Well, that would also be A mere pretence!

My histrionic art Though you deride, That's how I'd play that part--The Grand Duke's Bride!

ENSEMBLE.

ERNEST.JULIA.

Oh joy! when two glowing youngMy boy, when two glowing hearts, young heartsFrom the rise of the curtain, From the rise of the curtain, Thus throw themselves into their Thus throw themselves into their parts,parts, Success is most certain!Success is most certain!

If the role you're prepared to endow The role I'm prepared to endow With such delicate touches, With most delicate touch-es, By the heaven above us, I vow By the heaven above us, Ivow You shall be my Grand Duchess!I will be your Grand Duchess!

(Dance.)

Enter all the Chorus with LUDWIG, NOTARY, and LISA--all greatly agitated.

EXCITED CHORUS.

My goodness me! What shall we do ? Why, what a dreadful situation!

(To LUD.) It's all your fault, you booby you--you lump of indiscrimination!

I'm sure I don't know where to go--it's put me into such a tetter--But this at all events I know--the sooner we are off, the better!

ERN.What means this agitato? What d'ye seek?

As your Grand Duke elect I bid you speak!

SONG--LUDWIG.

Ten minutes since I met a chap Who bowed an easy salutation--Thinks I, "This gentleman, mayhap, Belongs to our Association."But, on the whole, Uncertain yet, A sausage-roll I took and eat--That chap replied (I don't embellish)By eating three with obvious relish.

CHORUS (angrily).Why, gracious powers, No chum of ours Could eat three sausage-rolls with relish!

LUD.Quite reassured, I let him know Our plot--each incident explaining;That stranger chuckled much, as though He thought me highly entertaining.

I told him all, Both bad and good;

I bade him call--

He said he would:

I added much--the more I muckled, The more that chuckling chummy chuckled!

ALL (angrily).A bat could see He couldn't be A chum of ours if he chuckled!

LUD.Well, as I bowed to his applause, Down dropped he with hysteric bellow--And that seemed right enough, because I am a devilish funny fellow.

Then suddenly, As still he squealed, It flashed on me That I'd revealed Our plot, with all details effective, To Grand Duke Rudolph's own detective!

ALL.What folly fell, To go and tell Our plot to any one's detective!

CHORUS.

(Attacking LUDWIG.) You booby dense--

You oaf immense, With no pretence To common sense!

A stupid muff Who's made of stuff Not worth a puff Of candle-snuff!

Pack up at once and off we go, unless we're anxious to exhibit Our fairy forms all in a row, strung up upon the Castle gibbet!

[Exeunt Chorus.Manent LUDWIG, LISA, ERNEST, JULIA, and NOTARY.

JULIA.Well, a nice mess you've got us into! There's an end of our precious plot! All up--pop--fizzle--bang--done for!

LUD.Yes, but--ha! ha!--fancy my choosing the Grand Duke's private detective, of all men, to make a confidant of! When you come to think of it, it's really devilish funny!

ERN.(angrily).When you come to think of it, it's extremely injudicious to admit into a conspiracy every pudding-headed baboon who presents himself!

LUD.Yes--I should never do that.If I were chairman of this gang, I should hesitate to enrol any baboon who couldn't produce satisfactory credentials from his last Zoological Gardens.

LISA.Ludwig is far from being a baboon.Poor boy, he could not help giving us away--it's his trusting nature--he was deceived.

JULIA (furiously).His trusting nature! (To LUDWIG.) Oh, I should like to talk to you in my own language for five minutes--only five minutes! I know some good, strong, energetic English remarks that would shrivel your trusting nature into raisins--only you wouldn't understand them!

LUD.Here we perceive one of the disadvantages of a neglected education!

ERN.(to JULIA).And I suppose you'll never be my Grand Duchess now!

JULIA.Grand Duchess? My good friend, if you don't produce the piece how can I play the part?

ERN.True.(To LUDWIG.) You see what you've done.

LUD.But, my dear sir, you don't seem to understand that the man ate three sausage-rolls.Keep that fact steadily before you.Three large sausage-rolls.

JULIA.Bah!--Lots of people eat sausage-rolls who are not conspirators.

LUD.Then they shouldn't.It's bad form.It's not the game.When one of the Human Family proposes to eat a sausage-roll, it is his duty to ask himself, "Am I a conspirator?" And if, on examination, he finds that he is not a conspirator, he is bound in honour to select some other form of refreshment.

LISA.Of course he is.One should always play the game.

(To NOTARY, who has been smiling placidly through this.) What are you grinning at, you greedy old man?

NOT.Nothing--don't mind me.It is always amusing to the legal mind to see a parcel of laymen bothering themselves about a matter which to a trained lawyer presents no difficulty whatever.

ALL.No difficulty!

NOT.None whatever! The way out of it is quite simple.

ALL.Simple?

NOT.Certainly! Now attend.In the first place, you two men fight a Statutory Duel.

ERN.A Statutory Duel?

JULIA.A Stat-tat-tatutory Duel! Ach! what a crack-jaw language this German is!

LUD.Never heard of such a thing.

同类推荐
  • 金轮王佛顶要略念诵法

    金轮王佛顶要略念诵法

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 护身命经之一

    护身命经之一

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 徐批叶天士晚年方案真本

    徐批叶天士晚年方案真本

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 毅斋诗文集

    毅斋诗文集

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 锦带书

    锦带书

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 此时星辰妙不可言

    此时星辰妙不可言

    “星辰……”一声呢喃将妙星辰揽入一个温暖的怀抱。苏泽言将头埋在妙星辰脖颈间。妙星辰的心一瞬间就软了,又听见苏泽言略微哽咽的声音“我……好想你”妙星辰的心又软的一塌糊涂。“老婆~”苏泽言讨好的说“闭嘴,不许乱叫”妙星辰强忍着嘴角的笑意,故作严肃的说。“老婆大人,我错了”“你没错,我错了。”“恩,那你赶紧去做饭吧!”(气哭了怎么办)对于妙星辰来说苏泽言是她的药,可对于苏泽言来说妙星辰是他的命。
  • 清秋万代

    清秋万代

    林依梦被时空管理者送至康熙四十一年。她没有惊天才能,没有绝世容貌。有的只是江南女子的清扬婉兮,北国女子的豪爽率真。穿越之前,是她自己选择的十四,没有与数字军团的矛盾与纠缠,她想要的只是默默地守护着那一份爱……
  • 有德女所问大乘经

    有德女所问大乘经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 晚春登大云寺南楼

    晚春登大云寺南楼

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 总裁孕妻:娇妻狠狠宠

    总裁孕妻:娇妻狠狠宠

    无缘无故有个孩子抱大腿是怎么回事?斗渣男,虐渣女要肿么破?慕心初第一次觉得,大脑不够用,还是抱一个金大腿快些。上金大腿之后。慕心初,“为什么我和你在同一个办公室?”陆御撤,“因为我们是夫妻。”夫妻便罢了了,为什么身后还跟着两个小屁孩。慕心初一脸的苦相,“陆御撤,你这个混蛋!”御撤,“基因太过于强大了。”
  • 迷失地下铁

    迷失地下铁

    一场诡异的车祸后,人们坠入了从未见识过更无从想象的地下世界。几队幸存者带着寻求出口的希望,在诡秘莫测、怪事迭出的地下世界中艰险地探索,与各种怪异的生物以及自己的同类斗智斗勇,比拼耐性。当迷失在一个陌生空间之中,人性的弱点暴露无遗,贪婪、暴戾、自私与正直、善良、坚守,试看人们如何抉择,最后能否回到充满阳光和爱的世界。
  • 攀岩

    攀岩

    本丛书以统一的体例、创新的形式,讲解各项目的起源与发展、运动保健、基本技术、运动技巧、比赛规则等,注重实用性、可操作性,使读者在学习过程中,不仅能够学会运动健身的方法,同时还能够学到保健方面的基本知识。
  • 她在古代超甜的

    她在古代超甜的

    穿越成人人喊打的弃妇又如何?咱身怀异能更生个天才宝贝。未婚先孕,没男人敢娶又如何?咱与儿子强强联手打出一方天地,天下美男尽情挑选。萌宝:娘亲银子神兽都给你找来了,还缺啥!某女:男人!萌宝:娘亲,门外美男三千给你送来了。某女扶额:肤白肉嫩小白脸,不喜!某妖男邪笑:天材地宝你的,金银珠宝你的,整个大陆你的。可否?母子对视:美男在手,再无敌手!成交。推荐新文《酷炫六小姐:王爷扛不住》
  • 青苹果时代

    青苹果时代

    这是一个发生在X学院里的点点滴滴,有欢笑、有泪水,更有你意想不到的一些故事。
  • 一诺千命

    一诺千命

    曾经脉络清晰的重大事件,曾经鲜活生动的著名人物,或者由于岁月的风吹雨打,或者由于别有用心者的篡改修饰,从而陷入到历史的“罗生门”中,在真相与假象之间徘徊,变得众说纷纭,莫衷一是;变得扑朔迷离,真假莫辩……