登陆注册
5591600000021

第21章 IN ERROR

They burnt a corpse upon the sand--

The light shone out afar;

It guided home the plunging boats That beat from Zanzibar.

Spirit of Fire,where'er Thy altars rise.

Thou art Light of Guidance to our eyes!

Salsette Boat-Song.

There is hope for a man who gets publicly and riotously drunk more often that he ought to do;but there is no hope for the man who drinks secretly and alone in his own house--the man who is never seen to drink.

This is a rule;so there must be an exception to prove it.

Moriarty's case was that exception.

He was a Civil Engineer,and the Government,very kindly,put him quite by himself in an out-district,with nobody but natives to talk to and a great deal of work to do.He did his work well in the four years he was utterly alone;but he picked up the vice of secret and solitary drinking,and came up out of the wilderness more old and worn and haggard than the dead-alive life had any right to make him.

You know the saying that a man who has been alone in the jungle for more than a year is never quite sane all his life after.People credited Moriarty's queerness of manner and moody ways to the solitude,and said it showed how Government spoilt the futures of its best men.Moriarty had built himself the plinth of a very god reputation in the bridge-dam-girder line.But he knew,every night of the week,that he was taking steps to undermine that reputation with L.L.L.and "Christopher"and little nips of liqueurs,and filth of that kind.He had a sound constitution and a great brain,or else he would have broken down and died like a sick camel in the district,as better men have done before him.

Government ordered him to Simla after he had come out of the desert;and he went up meaning to try for a post then vacant.That season,Mrs.Reiver--perhaps you will remember her--was in the height of her power,and many men lay under her yoke.Everything bad that could be said has already been said about Mrs.Reiver,in another tale.

Moriarty was heavily-built and handsome,very quiet and nervously anxious to please his neighbors when he wasn't sunk in a brown study.He started a good deal at sudden noises or if spoken to without warning;and,when you watched him drinking his glass of water at dinner,you could see the hand shake a little.But all this was put down to nervousness,and the quiet,steady,"sip-sip-sip,fill and sip-sip-sip,again,"that went on in his own room when he was by himself,was never known.Which was miraculous,seeing how everything in a man's private life is public property out here.

Moriarty was drawn,not into Mrs.Reiver's set,because they were not his sort,but into the power of Mrs.Reiver,and he fell down in front of her and made a goddess of her.This was due to his coming fresh out of the jungle to a big town.He could not scale things properly or see who was what.

Because Mrs.Reiver was cold and hard,he said she was stately and dignified.Because she had no brains,and could not talk cleverly,he said she was reserved and shy.Mrs.Reiver shy!Because she was unworthy of honor or reverence from any one,he reverenced her from a distance and dowered her with all the virtues in the Bible and most of those in Shakespeare.

This big,dark,abstracted man who was so nervous when a pony cantered behind him,used to moon in the train of Mrs.Reiver,blushing with pleasure when she threw a word or two his way.His admiration was strictly platonic:even other women saw and admitted this.He did not move out in Simla,so he heard nothing against his idol:which was satisfactory.Mrs.Reiver took no special notice of him,beyond seeing that he was added to her list of admirers,and going for a walk with him now and then,just to show that he was her property,claimable as such.Moriarty must have done most of the talking,for Mrs.Reiver couldn't talk much to a man of his stamp;and the little she said could not have been profitable.What Moriarty believed in,as he had good reason to,was Mrs.Reiver's influence over him,and,in that belief,set himself seriously to try to do away with the vice that only he himself knew of.

His experiences while he was fighting with it must have been peculiar,but he never described them.Sometimes he would hold off from everything except water for a week.Then,on a rainy night,when no one had asked him out to dinner,and there was a big fire in his room,and everything comfortable,he would sit down and make a big night of it by adding little nip to little nip,planning big schemes of reformation meanwhile,until he threw himself on his bed hopelessly drunk.He suffered next morning.

One night,the big crash came.He was troubled in his own mind over his attempts to make himself "worthy of the friendship"of Mrs.

Reiver.The past ten days had been very bad ones,and the end of it all was that he received the arrears of two and three-quarter years of sipping in one attack of delirium tremens of the subdued kind;beginning with suicidal depression,going on to fits and starts and hysteria,and ending with downright raving.As he sat in a chair in front of the fire,or walked up and down the room picking a handkerchief to pieces,you heard what poor Moriarty really thought of Mrs.Reiver,for he raved about her and his own fall for the most part;though he ravelled some P.W.D.accounts into the same skein of thought.He talked,and talked,and talked in a low dry whisper to himself,and there was no stopping him.He seemed to know that there was something wrong,and twice tried to pull himself together and confer rationally with the Doctor;but his mind ran out of control at once,and he fell back to a whisper and the story of his troubles.It is terrible to hear a big man babbling like a child of all that a man usually locks up,and puts away in the deep of his heart.Moriarty read out his very soul for the benefit of any one who was in the room between ten-thirty that night and two-forty-five next morning.

From what he said,one gathered how immense an influence Mrs.Reiver held over him,and how thoroughly he felt for his own lapse.His whisperings cannot,of course,be put down here;but they were very instructive as showing the errors of his estimates.

When the trouble was over,and his few acquaintances were pitying him for the bad attack of jungle-fever that had so pulled him down,Moriarty swore a big oath to himself and went abroad again with Mrs.

Reiver till the end of the season,adoring her in a quiet and deferential way as an angel from heaven.Later on he took to riding--not hacking,but honest riding--which was good proof that he was improving,and you could slam doors behind him without his jumping to his feet with a gasp.That,again,was hopeful.

How he kept his oath,and what it cost him in the beginning,nobody knows.He certainly managed to compass the hardest thing that a man who has drank heavily can do.He took his peg and wine at dinner,but he never drank alone,and never let what he drank have the least hold on him.

Once he told a bosom-friend the story of his great trouble,and how the "influence of a pure honest woman,and an angel as well"had saved him.When the man--startled at anything good being laid to Mrs.Reiver's door--laughed,it cost him Moriarty's friendship.

Moriarty,who is married now to a woman ten thousand times better than Mrs.Reiver--a woman who believes that there is no man on earth as good and clever as her husband--will go down to his grave vowing and protesting that Mrs.Reiver saved him from ruin in both worlds.

That she knew anything of Moriarty's weakness nobody believed for a moment.That she would have cut him dead,thrown him over,and acquainted all her friends with her discovery,if she had known of it,nobody who knew her doubted for an instant.

Moriarty thought her something she never was,and in that belief saved himself.Which was just as good as though she had been everything that he had imagined.

But the question is,what claim will Mrs.Reiver have to the credit of Moriarty's salvation,when her day of reckoning comes?

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 比尔盖茨(中外名人传记青少版)

    比尔盖茨(中外名人传记青少版)

    呈现在大家面前的这本传记并没有十分完整地描绘出比尔·盖茨的全貌,却是尽量全面地写出他作为一个普通人的成才经历。走向成功的道路是漫长的,充满荆棘的。比尔·盖茨白手起家,经过几十年的奋斗,终于取得了成功,文字可以记下这些事件、却不能表达个中辛酸。他成长中的挑战,他创业过程中的波折,这一切都造就了一个活生生的英雄形象,也同样给了我们很大的启发。现在就让我们带着这些疑问走近比尔·盖茨,来了解这个伟大人物不平凡的经历吧!
  • 圈子圈套

    圈子圈套

    本书以两个大型项目的销售商战为主线,环环相扣,机变迭出,计谋重重,故事精彩,情节扑朔迷离。更因基于真实案例,令人信服,完全可以称得上供各行业广大营销人员研读的营销“胜经”。书中所涉及到的IT行业的残酷商战和外企圈子内幕均以真实事件为原型,基于作者深厚的生活积淀,生动描写了在华外企高层的各地各色人物。各行各业的广大从业人员及外企白领们,都会觉得小说真实而深刻、生动而亲切。
  • BOSS别闹

    BOSS别闹

    “小东西,过来!”“不要!”某人邪笑靠近,“你跟着我,我给你你想要的一切,包括帮你打脸。另外……我有求必应。”渣前夫觉得净身出户太便宜了她,打算毁了她的名声,再踹出家门。她爬窗逃走,却撞上她平时避之唯恐不及的大BOSS。某女吓得逃之夭夭,却被某人抓住,“女人,吃了熊心豹子胆?连我的儿子都敢偷。”“我什么时候偷你儿子了?”某女心虚。
  • 太上十二上品飞天法轮劝戒妙经

    太上十二上品飞天法轮劝戒妙经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • The Christmas Books

    The Christmas Books

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 唇红齿白

    唇红齿白

    二十年前,一场牙周炎把杜凤的日子弄得乱七八糟。杜凤哪天牙齿都好好的,偏偏那天,牙龈却发炎了,半边脸肿得像斜扣着一块面包。她从镜子中望见自己的第一眼起,就下了决心,不见欧丰沛。问题是,欧丰沛如果是一般的人,不见也就不见了吧,那几年,杜凤掉头不见的人多了去了,可是欧丰沛是十八中校长的小舅子。前几天,校长老婆欧丰芷下课后碰到杜凤母亲,兴致很高地说,喂,气色真好啊,是不是要当外婆了呀?杜凤母亲被突如其来的这句话弄得有点意外,各种感受还来不及涌起,先咧开嘴扑哧大笑。
  • 我们那如此怒放过的青春

    我们那如此怒放过的青春

    回忆我们大学的时光依昔如同昨日,那时我们纯真的恋爱快乐的生活。社会生活把我们拉到现实的残酷中,我们开始在这残酷的现实社会中学着挣扎、学着坚强了,也学会了妥协。而且我们还不知不觉地变老,青春就这么地容易凋零吗?这是一个很残酷的事实,但我们不得不接受这样的事实。因为人一代繁衍着一代,都是这么走过来的。不同的只是现在轮到我们了,我们的青春也将像怒放过的花朵,慢慢地将会面临着凋谢……本故事讲述了一群年轻大学生,在当今这个物欲横流与精神危机的社会中,是怎样从自卑与放纵中逐步走向成熟与成功的道德情感故事。
  • “啃老”战争(财蜜eMook)

    “啃老”战争(财蜜eMook)

    曾经我妈拿出一笔钱敦促我买房的时候,我不想啃老,没有珍惜,等限购令一出才后悔莫及,几年后看着房价5k涨到5w,简直悔青肠子了,如果上天再给我一次机会,我一定要当一次‘啃老族’,坚决把房子买下来!” 广义上来说,成年后还用父母的钱,就算是“啃老”了,哪怕你并不是失业在家游手好闲,而是有稳定的工作收入,个人也很努力,只是买房时希望父母有能力且愿意支持首付,仍要面对尴尬的“啃老”质疑。 但另一方面,房价飙升让工薪族筹集首付金遥遥无望,父母的钱的确是唯一可用的稻草。
  • 誓不为妃

    誓不为妃

    一个外表懒散,实则精明,还有点卑鄙无耻的女主,穿越来到古代。一个外表灿如阳光,实则腹黑得无与伦加的强势男主,两人展开宫廷无间道,到底谁赢谁输,拭目以待。
  • 美女总裁的豪门夫婿

    美女总裁的豪门夫婿

    他曾是黑暗世界的王者,直到遇到她,自此相信了光明。许她:“我意寄清风,我爱随枯草。”的一世诺言。他本来以为人性尔虞我诈,自私自利。但是幸好有他们还了世界一个“千里赴孤坟,百死报天恩。”的豪情。岁月无波,时光静好。