登陆注册
5382100000067

第67章 CHAPTER XVI(3)

The master called me in to prayers, but I can't say I could put my mind to them, for my heart was beating so. However, it was a comfort to have had an offer of holy matrimony; and though it flustered me, it made me think more of myself. In the night, I began to wonder if I'd not been cruel and hard to him. You see, I were feverish-like; and the old song of Barbary Allen would keep running in my head, and I thought I were Barbary, and he were young Jemmy Gray, and that maybe he'd die for love of me; and Ipictured him to mysel', lying on his death-bed, with his face turned to the wall 'wi' deadly sorrow sighing,' and I could ha' pinched mysel' for having been so like cruel Barbary Allen. And when I got up next day, Ifound it hard to think on the real Jerry Dixon I had seen the night before, apart from the sad and sorrowful Jerry I thought on a-dying, when I were between sleeping and waking. And for many a day I turned sick, when I heard the passing bell, for I thought it were the bell loud-knelling which were to break my heart wi' a sense of what I'd missed in saying 'No' to Jerry, and so Idling him with cruelty. But in less than a three week, I heard parish bells a-ringing merrily for a wedding; and in the course of the morning, some one says to me, 'Hark! how the bells is ringing for Jerry Dixon's wedding!' And, all on a sudden, he changed back again from a heart-broken young fellow, like Jemmy Gray, into a stout, middle-aged man, ruddy-complexioned, with a wart on his left cheek like life!" Sally waited for some exclamation at the conclusion of her tale; but receiving none, she stepped softly to the bedside, and there lay Ruth, peaceful as death, with her baby on her breast. "I thought I'd lost some of my gifts if I could not talk a body to sleep,"said Sally, in a satisfied and self-complacent tone. Youth is strong and powerful, and makes a hard battle against sorrow. So Ruth strove and strengthened, and her baby flourished accordingly; and before the little celandines were out on the hedge-banks, or the white violets had sent forth their fragrance from the border under the south wall of Miss Benson's small garden, Ruth was able to carry her baby into that sheltered place on sunny days. She often wished to thank Mr. Benson and his sister, but she did not know how to tell the deep gratitude she felt, and therefore she was silent.

But they understood her silence well. One day, as she watched her sleeping child, she spoke to Miss Benson, with whom she happened to be alone. "Do you know of any cottage where the people are clean, and where they would not mind taking me in?" asked she. "Taking you in! What do you mean?" said Miss Benson, dropping her knitting, in order to observe Ruth more closely. "I mean," said Ruth, "where I might lodge with my baby--any very poor place would do, only it must be clean, or he might be ill." "And what in the world do you want to go and lodge in a cottage for?" said Miss Benson indignantly. Ruth did not lift up her eyes, but she spoke with a firmness which showed that she had considered the subject. "I think I could make dresses. I know I did not learn as much as I might, but perhaps I might do for servants and people who are not particular." "Servants are as particular as any one," said Miss Benson, glad to lay hold of the first objection that she could. "Well! somebody who would be patient with me," said Ruth. "Nobody is patient over an ill-fitting gown," put in Miss Benson. "There's the stuff spoilt, and what not!" "Perhaps I could find plain work to do," said Ruth, very meekly. "That I can do very well; mamma taught me, and I liked to learn from her. If you would be so good, Miss Benson, you might tell people I could do plain work very neatly, and punctually, and cheaply." "You'd get sixpence a day, perhaps," said Miss Benson "and who would take care of baby, I should like to know? Prettily he'd be neglected, would not he? Why, he'd have the croup and the typhus fever in no time, and be burnt to ashes after." "I have thought of all. Look how he sleeps! Hush, darling;" for just at this point he began to cry, and to show his determination to be awake, as if in contradiction to his mother's words. Ruth took him up, and carried him about the room while she went on speaking. "Yes, just now I know he will not sleep; but very often he will, and in the night he always does." "And so you'd work in the night and kill yourself, and leave your poor baby an orphan. Ruth! I'm ashamed of you. Now, brother" (Mr. Benson had just come in), "is not this too bad of Ruth? here she is planning to go away and leave us, just as we--as I, at least--have grown so fond of baby, and he's beginning to know me." "Where were you thinking of going to, Ruth?" interrupted Mr. Benson, with mild surprise. "Anywhere to be near you and Miss Benson; in any poor cottage where I might lodge very cheaply, and earn my livelihood by taking in plain sewing, and perhaps a little dressmaking; and where I could come and see you and dear Miss Benson sometimes and bring baby." "If he was not dead before then of some fever, or burn, or scald, poor neglected child, or you had not worked yourself to death with never sleeping"said Miss Benson. Mr. Benson thought a minute or two, and then he spoke to Ruth-- "Whatever you may do when this little fellow is a year old, and able to dispense with some of a mother's care, let me beg you, Ruth, as a favour to me--as a still greater favour to my sister, is it not, Faith?" "Yes; you may put it so if you like." "To stay with us," continued he, "till then. When baby is twelve months old, we'll talk about it again, and very likely before then some opening may be shown us. Never fear leading an idle life, Ruth. We'll treat you as a daughter, and set you all the household tasks; and it is not for your sake that we ask you to stay, but for this little dumb helpless child's:

同类推荐
  • 正统北狩事迹

    正统北狩事迹

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 天台治略

    天台治略

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Lady Susan

    Lady Susan

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Sons of the Soil

    Sons of the Soil

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 面门

    面门

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 答问

    答问

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 三世迷离一世殇

    三世迷离一世殇

    几许情深深几许,几世迷离几世殇?他毁她数次,她只冷笑一声,轻抵住他的剑身。罂粟花般魔媚的眼光,扫了扫面前不能自拔的他,声音如寒冰般刺骨,“嗯哼?你要保这天下?你要护这苍生?我却偏要这天下生灵涂炭、草木成灰。
  • 今朝醉

    今朝醉

    放荡不羁的少年王辰无意间救下一名受伤的男子,从男子的口中得知。冥界和地球两个世界的时空通道被贯穿了?这样也就算了,竟然还有大批的异界高手入侵。对于这样的事情,我王辰地球上数一数二的古武宗师如何能够置身事外呢?
  • 牛津通识读本:尼采(中文版)

    牛津通识读本:尼采(中文版)

    1889年,尼采突然神智失常。此前,他的哲学几乎完全被世人忽视;此后,他逐渐成为各类人争相膜拜的偶像。然而,对尼采思想的解读,众说纷纭,莫衷一是。尼采当年曾有预见:“最重要的是,不要将我和不属于我的思想混为一体!”本书通过对尼采生平与著作的探究,揭示了尼采思想中固有的模糊与歧义,并对百年来人们对尼采作品的诸多误读进行了梳理。
  • 第一百零九将

    第一百零九将

    温亚军,现为北京武警总部某文学杂志主编。著有长篇小说伪生活等六部,小说集硬雪、驮水的日子等七部。获第三届鲁迅文学奖,第十一届庄重文文学奖,《小说选刊》《中国作家》和《上海文学》等刊物奖,入选中国小说学会排行榜。中国作家协会会员。
  • 因明入正理论

    因明入正理论

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 东方舞蹈审美论

    东方舞蹈审美论

    “东方”这个词总是勾连着独特的美学意象和文化气质,“东方舞蹈”则是这种美学意象最为生动、可感的呈现。本书作者从“东方美学”的宏观视角对中国、日本、印度的传统舞蹈艺术进行了形态描述与学理分析相融合的研究,从身体观念、审美特征、美学气质与艺术精神四个层面论述了“东方舞蹈”的独特艺术魅力。
  • 祈愿造梦师

    祈愿造梦师

    续作《快穿之祈愿造梦师》正在连载中,求收藏! 以下为正经简介↓↓↓ ——『无男主!无男主!无男主!重要的事情说三遍。』紫柒16岁生辰那天,见义勇为出了车祸,在重症监护室躺了两年。 18岁时意识与系统075相遇,开启了奇妙的快穿之旅,为每一位委托者达成心愿,编织未来。 这是一场漫无目的的旅游,没有终点。 你要和我一起吗?
  • 请到村里洗桑拿

    请到村里洗桑拿

    入夜,从北京打工回来的合理提着一个包进了村主任家。佛争一炷香,人争一口气。他想在村里建一个桑拿中心。村主任说,合理,你要建洗澡堂子就建洗澡堂子呗,建什么桑拿中心,把我都弄糊涂了。合理说,主任,这桑拿与洗澡不一样。村主任说,一样,不都是洗光屁股?不过是换了个洋说法。你想建就建,不用请示我。村主任爱用请示这个词,显得庄重,气派。村主任是一方的神,大到计划生育宅基地,小到吃喝拉撒睡,人家都有权管哩。主任,不给你请示能行?你得给我找地方呀。我总不能建在半天空里吧。
  • 紫灵魔诀

    紫灵魔诀

    全属性天才,灵武双修,八岁筑基,十二岁结丹,三十载元婴,一百八十载渡劫羽化。苍蓝大陆万年不破的轮回。是谁,终将改变这一切。