"Ah,fair sir,it were woundily hard to tell,they are so many,and do so lap the one upon the other,and being made all in the same image and tincted with the same color,one may not know the one league from its fellow,nor how to count them except they be taken apart,and ye wit well it were God's work to do that,being not within man's capacity;for ye will note --""Hold on,hold on,never mind about the distance;WHEREABOUTS does the castle lie?What's the direction from here?""Ah,please you sir,it hath no direction from here;by reason that the road lieth not straight,but turneth evermore;wherefore the direction of its place abideth not,but is some time under the one sky and anon under another,whereso if ye be minded that it is in the east,and wend thitherward,ye shall observe that the way of the road doth yet again turn upon itself by the space of half a circle,and this marvel happing again and yet again and still again,it will grieve you that you had thought by vanities of the mind to thwart and bring to naught the will of Him that giveth not a castle a direction from a place except it pleaseth Him,and if it please Him not,will the rather that even all castles and all directions thereunto vanish out of the earth,leaving the places wherein they tarried desolate and vacant,so warning His creatures that where He will He will,and where He will not He --""Oh,that's all right,that's all right,give us a rest;never mind about the direction,HANG the direction --I beg pardon,I beg a thousand pardons,I am not well to-day;pay no attention when I soliloquize,it is an old habit,an old,bad habit,and hard to get rid of when one's digestion is all disordered with eating food that was raised forever and ever before he was born;good land!a man can't keep his functions regular on spring chickens thirteen hundred years old.But come --never mind about that;let's --have you got such a thing as a map of that region about you?Now a good map --""Is it peradventure that manner of thing which of late the unbelievers have brought from over the great seas,which,being boiled in oil,and an onion and salt added thereto,doth --""What,a map?What are you talking about?Don't you know what a map is?There,there,never mind,don't explain,I hate explanations;they fog a thing up so that you can't tell anything about it.Run along,dear;good-day;show her the way,Clarence."
Oh,well,it was reasonably plain,now,why these donkeys didn't prospect these liars for details.It may be that this girl had a fact in her somewhere,but I don't believe you could have sluiced it out with a hydraulic;nor got it with the earlier forms of blasting,even;it was a case for dynamite.
Why,she was a perfect ass;and yet the king and his knights had listened to her as if she had been a leaf out of the gospel.It kind of sizes up the whole party.And think of the simple ways of this court:this wandering wench hadn't any more trouble to get access to the king in his palace than she would have had to get into the poorhouse in my day and country.In fact,he was glad to see her,glad to hear her tale;with that adventure of hers to offer,she was as welcome as a corpse is to a coroner.
Just as I was ending-up these reflections,Clarence came back.I remarked upon the barren result of my efforts with the girl;hadn't got hold of a single point that could help me to find the castle.The youth looked a little surprised,or puzzled,or something,and intimated that he had been wondering to himself what I had wanted to ask the girl all those questions for.
"Why,great guns,"I said,"don't I want to find the castle?And how else would I go about it?""La,sweet your worship,one may lightly answer that,I ween.She will go with thee.They always do.She will ride with thee.""Ride with me?Nonsense!"
"But of a truth she will.She will ride with thee.Thou shalt see.""What?She browse around the hills and scour the woods with me --alone --and I as good as engaged to be married?Why,it's scandalous.Think how it would look."My,the dear face that rose before me!The boy was eager to know all about this tender matter.I swore him to secresy and then whispered her name --"Puss Flanagan."He looked disappointed,and said he didn't remember the countess.How natural it was for the little courtier to give her a rank.He asked me where she lived.
"In East Har--"I came to myself and stopped,a little confused;then I said,"Never mind,now;I'll tell you some time."And might he see her?Would I let him see her some day?
It was but a little thing to promise --thirteen hundred years or so --and he so eager;so I said Yes.But I sighed;I couldn't help it.And yet there was no sense in sighing,for she wasn't born yet.But that is the way we are made:we don't reason,where we feel;we just feel.
